Keeping The Faith Two Pounds At A Time

I went to my seventh month check up yesterday. As of what I’ve been weighing myself, it was a two-point-one pound gain. The doctor’s records show that I lost five pounds since my last visit. Two pounds isn’t very much, and that could have gone in either direction. It could have been the poop I didn’t get in before, or just the water that I’ve been consuming. Even better, it could be the fact that I weighed in on a different scale than I have been using for my two week weigh ins. Plus it had only been a week since I last checked myself. I figure that it doesn’t really count, but for the sake of transparency, I’m putting it out there for everybody.

I had a five-day weekend and I’m not gonna lie, work is killing my mood. I really don’t want to battle the 110 degree heat tomorrow. With that I challenged myself to a six-day ten thousand step challenge. I did well, until I woke up and realized that the vibrations from the fan on my desk made it look like I walked over 57,000 steps in an eight hour period. That just threw everything off for me, but to be honest, the heat was whooping my ass anyway, and I’ll take the sixth day as failed, but I still got in over 50,000 steps in the last five-days, hell more like 60,0000.

I have two weeks until my schedule at work shifts from a 5am-3pm time slot to a 1pm-11pm time slot. I have mixed feelings about this. The negative side is that I’ll spend less time with the kids, and that kills me with helping them out during they’re grappling sessions. It’s a bit weird because I’ve been on the day schedule for the last ten years. That makes me a little nervous, yet being someone who always tries to look for a silver lining, the biggest positive comes to mind… I don’t have to get up at four in the morning anymore. I know it might seem a bit strange that I would feel that way, but God I hate getting up at anytime before six. Hell, I could even handle getting up about five-five-thirty, but there’s just something about four o’clock that I just don’t like doing. I mean, I usually can’t convince myself to get into bed before ten at night anyway, so that might have something to do with it.

Other big news, is I finally heard back from one of the jobs that I’ve been trying to get. They said that they were gonna see about getting me an interview, and that was still up to the higher boss on that. This is what I’ve been wanting for so long, yet there’s that part of me that is afraid that I’m not good enough. Yeah, I do realize that it sounds a bit silly, but that’s the mind of someone who’s had low self-esteem issues for the better part of my life. I also know that I’m not the only one who’s had those types of thoughts. I really hope that things go the way, I’d like them too.

Also, we’re just about ready to film The Reunion. We had a final production meeting on it, and we’re currently going to be getting a reading in, having to work around everyone’s schedule. So, with all the parties notified, we should be filming on August fourth. I’m excited to get this going, as it brings the crew back together for another fun time. This month is turning into craziness though, as Friday the thirteenth, I’m taking the wife out of town for our seventeen year anniversary. Then, next weekend we take the oldest up north about five hours for a Paramour concert. This is going to be an exciting adventure.

I’m glad to be able to be busy doing all these things, and right before my schedule change too. I  think that things are going to be more interesting from here on out, and I plan on working on getting several things done within the next several months, so that I can help boost my demo reel with professional work as well.

Be good to each other, this is the Director, and that’s a wrap.

Today(or Tomorrow? part 2)

Today was the real test….. After six weeks of being off of work I went back and put on my uniform. While I’ve noticed some changes in my body, and the movement I have, this was the real test, my uniform, which I have worn for the last ten years, showed me where I am physically. It’s huge on me, and I haven’t felt that way in a long time. It was amazing to feel that I’ve lost several pounds, and several inches. The pants make me feel like the Genie in Aladdin. That’s an accomplishment since over a month ago, things were a bit tight on me.

I came home and took a nap, but not because the day was hard, but because I couldn’t fall asleep until after eleven-forty. That doesn’t sound too bad, until you put into the context that I had to be up at four in the morning. At least when I did fall asleep, it was heavy, and nice. I think that getting back into a schedule is going to be good for me, even if I have to get up at four in the freaking morning. Three-thirty for those days I have to open busier spots. Have I mentioned how I hate getting up before six? True story.

Now, today ended up being kind of an easy day because we had more than enough coverage to man the spots that I work, and it was nice to have that for a first day back. As the day progressed, I saw many people who’ve been following my weight loss journey, and it was nice to be welcomed back. It was nicer to be told that I was looking good(and yes the ego feels satisfied). I’m trying to measure how many steps I take while at work so that I can do the math on my ten thousand steps, that I’m supposed to get in a day, also something that I haven’t quite made yet. At least my body held up, and standing for hours didn’t hurt so bad.

As the point that I made yesterday, I’m a different person, both physically, and mentally. I’m standing straighter, and I’m keeping a good attitude. Some days I think that it’s going to be hard to think that I will be, but at least it was a familiar feeling. Muscle memory maybe? All I know is that the routine, is going to help me get back the focus that I need. I think the saddest part of work is that most of the people I have become close to have left. Yes, I still have a few people that I really like, but my closest of friends have gone on to better things(which I’m proud of).

I’m going to take a week or two before I really start pushing myself and going to the gym after work, I feel that I just want to get back to used to standing for the long hours in the day before I decide to “kill” myself in the gym. I’m not trying to hurt myself, and I don’t want to do any internal damage, because of the staples in my stomach. I’m looking forward to dropping the next fifty pounds though. That would put me at a weight that I haven’t been since my almost seventeen year old was born.

At least I’m not allowing food to cope with my emotions. Yes, I still like to eat, but it’s no longer the same relationship that I once had with it. Life’s going to get more interesting and enjoyable this year. I plan on keeping up with getting the life I actually do deserve, both for me, and for my family.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.