39th Year of a Life

Yesterday was my birthday, and I’ve been on this Earth for thirty-nine years. I had so many people wish me a happy birthday, that it feels good to know that people actually do think about me. I have friends, and family, that’s a great feeling to know the appreciation of being apart of people’s lives. Let’s look at the retrospect of life in the past year, shall we?

The first thing to note is that I’m a blogger, and I’ve been doing this for the last year and a half now. I started it for a class, because we’re to build our own websites. This happened to be my first. My second is my portfolio/promotional website: https://ckeeling.myportfolio.com/home-page feel free to check it out. It shows of a bit of my work, and it’s a great way to promote one of my “brands”. I kept my WordPress website, because I wanted to have a place to put my work, this particular site(because I have two) became the place where I decided to try my hand at blogging. As a writer, I thought that this would be a great way to practice. It has been so much fun putting my thoughts out into the cyber space.

The second reason that I find that blogging has helped me grow as a person and has been therapeutic at times when I’ve been depressed, and it’s helped to sort out some of my thoughts. Plus it’s been a great way to network with people with shared interests. It helps when people have gone through common experiences, when they come together in support. Sadly, not everyone seems to “get” that. I’ve been enlightened to other’s plights this way.

This last year was the year to start getting the new me ready for the world! I’d been trying to get to a place where I could be happy with myself, and it’s taken a long time to get to that point. This was the year that forced my hand to make those drastic changes. I was done being trapped in the flesh casing that was bringing me down and I decided to get weight loss surgery.Patient_Image 12_04_17 10_57_29

This was what I looked like 12/4/17. I had lost about thirty pounds by this time and today I look like this:


I feel so much better about myself, and this is just the beginning. I’ve been trying to watch what I eat, and I’m also moving so much easier. For the longest time, I had this mass sitting on the middle of my chest that just prevented me from doing anything comfortably, and now that it’s gone I can move faster, longer, and clothes fit better.

The other big thing that happened this year took three years to complete and that was to get my Bachelor’s of Science degree in Digital Filmmaking with a 3.76 GPA. I’ve never put so much time and effort in any class like this before and I’m happy to have finished with school. Now, I’m making efforts to better myself professionally.25588135_10209494932724657_3328647117328513282_o

I’m looking for a job that I can apply my degree in, and I’ve also been working on my own independent production company for over the last year as well. I love the process of writing and then getting people to become my characters, and having the chance to direct them. Yes, I think thirty-nine is the year that amazing things are going to happen for me, and I can’t wait to see what’s in store.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

3 Days To Go

I had to be early into work yesterday. I got up at three and had to be to work at four. I’m not going to lie, I hate getting up that early, but I do what must be done. I was going to be in the boonies for about eleven hours, so there was no real contact with the normal world or cell service. As much as I say that work goes by fast on a ten hour schedule, yesterday dragged on.

When I got home, I relaxed, ate my liquid dinner, enjoyed Netflix with the family. I went to bed at eight-forty at night. This is an unusual practice for me, because I usually can’t get to bed before ten. That’s how my body operates. Even when I have to be to work at four, I still hit bed about ten. I run off of about five hours sleep most days that I work.

About five this morning I’m up, and I’m taking  care of business for graduation, plus I decided that since I didn’t blog last night, I would come on here and give an update on how I’m doing, and how the weight loss journey is going. Plus I figured that maybe my thoughts would come out through my fingers as I type because I’m not really sure how I feel about things right now.

I don’t think that I’m scared, I know that this is a common surgery and that there are less complications than other surgeries. Hell, I’ve even joked about being bummed that I might miss Star Wars: The Last Jedi on opening weekend. I’ve joked even more that when I get back to work that I will be less of a man then people see now.

The truth of the matter is…. I’m uncertain how things will go. I know that life has been throwing me a whole lot of good lately, and I want to say that this is going to be one of those good things, but nothing is certain. It’s not like I’m afraid that I’m going to die, or anything like that, though I accepted the concept of death long ago. I’m just unsure of what changes are coming.

One of those things that I’ve read online was that the taste buds change. So, what is it that’s going to change for mine? What about the loose skin? Will I be able to accept these changes? I’ve got a game plan, and I’ve been working on other aspects of my life that I think the weight loss, even as superficial as it is, is going to better me professionally. I’ve also read that sex improves(who doesn’t want that, right?), but will it inflate my ego?Something that I’ve always had to compensate for the fact that I’ve been larger my whole life, with few skinny moments.

I feel that positive things will keep happening for the good, and I think that’s the way I should set out taking life, but the unknown is scary, and exciting both at the same time. The only thing that I’m not looking forward to is the pain and the recovery. I’m handling the liquid diet so far, and I know that I’m about to go to the clear liquids for the next month or so. Well, I guess that means no Christmas goodies for me this year, and no birthday cake for my thirty-ninth birthday in January, but I’m not too heart broken about that.

Keep following me as I continue this adventure, because I want people to know what it’s like going through this, just incase this option comes across their laps as well.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.