“Don’t Call It a Come Back”

It’s funny to see where I was in the beginnings of my blogging life. So, much has changed since the early blogs.

I’ve been contemplating things that I’ve been planing on doing with life. The first thing that I’ve promised myself is to start working on this page as a part of a regular routine.  I hope that I can keep myself on track as I continue to explore who I am as a person, and improve myself along the way.

    As I review these few sentences that I wrote in 2016. I remember thinking that I would try and write 500 words on every blog. I also remember thinking that 500 words were far harder to come up with than I thought they would be.

As I’ve gone along, my writing has gotten better, and my words are averaging about 670. My views and likes have gone up as well. That makes me feel a bit justified in the writings that I do.

At that time, I thought, “hey, I’ll just right all my thoughts down.” Little did I know that I would finally come up with a plan that focused more on mental health and a weight loss journey. I knew that the mental health was always something that I planned on addressing, and that’s why I keep a certain amount of transparency in my life. It’s a raw and brutal truth at times. I see that some people don’t seem to handle my decisions well, and to each their own really. I’m doing this because I know what it’s like to be someone who didn’t know what to do about a given situation and was too afraid to ask for the help, until it was too late.

I don’t want anyone to ever get into a desperate situation that could have lasting negative effects. That’s why I’ve asked myself to commit to this task. It’s not always easy to speak on what is currently going on in my life. I don’t always feel comfortable being vulnerable, but I find it necessary, not only in my personal growth, but in the aid of others. It’s refreshing when I get pm’s that state how helpful that was for a situation someone was in.

If I’m to speak plainly about some of the comments. The ego’s been fed when the pretty girl I had a crush on in school, mentions how proud she is of what I’m doing. Hopefully she, or they know who they are, and thank you for helping me feel that I’ve not waisted my time on this.

Exploring who I am as a person, has brought me on an incredible journey, as I’ve made more friends, and more solid relationships along the way. I’m fortunate enough to say that I’ve got an amazing group of people, who I get to work with on the personal projects. Part of that discovery is that being transparent about myself has helped give courage to putting myself out there to network, and not be afraid of asking for help.

It’s in these connections that I find the most reward. Then to look back on the first few blogs that I did, and to see where I’m at now compared to where I was, or what I thought I would be doing at that time, it blows my mind. Never would I have thought that I would be as driven to succeed as I am now. The film company was something I always wanted, but to add the CK Project  and the Geekultural Experience wasn’t what I was striving for at the time. Hell, I don’t even think I was in any kind of thoughts about having the Gastric Sleeve done.

Now, I’m over 100 pounds down, and I’m constantly staying busy with my brands to get them up and successful. Anything worth doing is never easy, but I’m determined to make something amazing happen, and I have the right people involved to help me get there, and they get to share in that success with me as well.

Anyway, this is the Director and that’s a wrap.

Chris Keeling Productions

I’ve been contemplating things that I’ve been planing on doing with life. The first thing that I’ve promised myself is to start working on this page as a part of a regular routine.  I hope that I can keep myself on track as I continue to explore who I am as a person, and improve myself along the way.

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Phase Two And A Growth Spurt

A continuation of the last blog…ish: Man what a weekend this turned out to be. As I mentioned visiting the campus of the Los Angeles Film School, I learned a lot from that visit, and I’ve been trying to apply it ever since. So far, my film resume has been updated, though I’m still waiting to hear what my advisor has to say on that, and I updated my LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christopher-keeling-b57a7313a, just in case…you know if you want to check it out, maybe try and make a professional connection.

Saturday is the day that most of you have come to follow because, of my weight loss journey, well I lost another 2.3 pounds which brings my weight too 343.2 with a total loss of 86.7 pounds of fatty tissue. I’m so close to getting to that one hundred pound mark, and I’ll be there before you know it. Which also brings me to another bit of good news. I can fully workout again. My gastric doctor said that I can get into full workout mode, which I’m working with a friend, who’s going to become my trainer. This is someone I’ve known a long time, and I have faith will kick start my metabolism even faster. I look forward to that challenge.

So, let’ move forward to Sunday’s adventure. I’ve been working with this older gentleman named Philip Weinstein, he’s eighty-one, and has had a life as a producer and lighting guy in Hollywood. I was introduced to him by way of my friend and former drama teacher Janis. Philip has spirit, and at the age of eighty-one has decided that he wants to be a boxer. He’s considered the oldest un-ranked amateur boxer in the United States. He’s got personality for sure.

So, through him, I’ve gotten to meet and get to know his coach Antoine Hood, who’s also a nice guy, who looks like Luke Cage, and most defiantly can kick ass like Luke Cage. Antoine and my trainer friend Sam work together, and that’s kind of how the circle of reacquainting with old friends took place, but before I lose track. Philip has hired me not only to be his videographer, but his social media presence.

It’s funny how my love of acting has brought me to the point of wanting to direct, and that it would lead me to my first paying client. Where I find myself even more lucky is the fact that I’m teaching Philip about modern filmmaking, and he in turn is teaching me about living in the business itself. He’s also a stanch supporter of the CK Project and tells me that he’s happy to see me take my life in a more positive direction.

Is it weird that my first paying client would also become a mentor to me? He’s a great guy, and the experience that I’m gaining is valuable, and his shared knowledge is also worth every minute he’s teaching me something. I wonder what will happen when I start my next free lance project, where that will take me…

So, phase two has really started to lift off the ground, and with so much coming towards me all at once, I’ve not even had a chance to think of where everything is taking me, but I do know that it’s somewhere good. I just feel bad that I can’t seem to carry on a very good conversation through text, because I’m so buy. I know that as March will come to an end, that life might find a bit of normalcy, or maybe this is the new normal. Either way, I’m not complaining. It keeps me busy, and then I don’t even have anytime to be depressed, even though that hasn’t been an issue for a while.

My weight, my health, both physically and mentally, and my life is really starting to line up, and I’m proud of the evolution that my growth has taken, and as I get ready to leave the Film student life behind as I become an alumni, I’m gaining the right tools at the right time, and I’m going to continue to work hard so that I can get the big pay off in the end.

My best friend will be down here from the state of Minnesota in a couple of days. I’m excited because she’s one of the few people who’s been there through the tough times for me. I’m glad that she could be here as I walk down the isle because graduating is an accomplishment. Life is going to get better, day by day. This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

10 Years And More Paperwork!

So, I have to do paperwork because I’ve been at my job for ten years. Being the well oiled machine that I work for, I’m having to answer things from years ago, and then there are things that I don’t ever think that I knew. All I can think is man…..I’ve been doing this for way too long.

It’s given me a time to reflect on where my life has been, and where I’m going. The past is a bit blurry because I’ve not always handled life in the best ways possible, but as I’ve gotten older, and gained tools, I’m getting better at it. I’ve hit a few very dark times, and part of doing this paper work has caused me to try and remember through those dark clouds. I’d like to say those thoughts are sunshine and rainbows, but a rain cloud with thunder and lightning would fit that much better.

“It builds character,” or so that’s what they saying goes. It proves that I’m a survivor, even if it fucked me up a bit along the way. I’m a survivor…that’s the key there. Even when I wanted life to end, or wanted to hide away and disappear, I made it through those times, and I’m better for it. I’ve gotten married to a great lady, who loves and supports me, and we’ve had some great kids together, who I’ve not always been the best towards as well. We’re not perfect, but I love this family of mine.

“It builds character,” at least I’ve been able to analyze this and help it become something more positive in my life. Being someone who’s had insecurity issues and depression issues throughout my life, has built a thicker skin than when I was a child. I’ve heard the insults that people have said about me behind my back, and to my front. Most of the time I laugh because I think of how lame some of the words are. I think to myself, can’t you come up with something a bit better than that? Hamburger boy? Fatty Mc Fat Fat… whatever fucking insult they make to have a laugh. If it was me, I’d go for the jugular, and that’s the sad part, because that’s what my situation molded me to be when I was younger. I know that I have a mean streak and a low tolerance of bullshit, but I do try to not let that side out most of the time.

“It builds character,” and that’s true. I think that it’s all in how we decide to let it form us. At a low point, I finally decided that I was going to do everything that I could so that I could be a beacon of positivity in this world. Too many want to beat other’s down because, like they say, “misery, loves company.” I think that’s too true, and I don’t want to be the one to add to that problem. The funny part is that during my last “dark time”, I was hating everything and everybody, myself especially. Some would think that I’m being positive for other people’s sakes, though the truth is that I’m doing it for me, because I don’t want to ever feel the way I did before. Plus I’m starting to get this feeling that the world gives back to you what you project, and I’m wanting to feel positive vibes instead of the negative vibes that I had felt.

I’m feeling the balance between mind and body these days. The focus is getting stronger, and the  motivation is being felt by others as well(see several previous post). Well, I have so much more info to get before I can finish my paperwork, and I’ve got some studying to do as well.  So this is the director and that’s a wrap.

Disneyland-Pushed Twice As Hard

So, my wife and I decided that we would make up our sixteenth anniversary, which happened in July of last year, by going to Disneyland, without the kids. Yes, I do realize that seven months is a long time to postpone our celebration, but I was working on a movie at that time, and we just ended up being busy with life through a lot of that. It’s nice when we get some time where the two of us can just be a couple. Having kids, that gets hard to do, especially when they tend to be needy.

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So to say the least, I got my 10,000 steps before eleven-o-clock. I best part is that I made it so long without having to take a break. I didn’t really slow down until about four in the afternoon, by then I think I was around 15,000 steps, but it was so worth the effort put forth. I can’t believe that I had made almost ten miles, it’s crazy to think that I made it that far.

In contrast, today I’ve only gone about 5,945 steps. I think that I deserve a break from that kick ass effort from yesterday, but I do plan on challenging myself like that again soon. Perhaps during a long hike or something, but then again, I might need more time before I do that.

The biggest highlights of yesterday was that I didn’t struggle to get through any of the turn styles, or on the rides, I wasn’t uncomfortable. That’s a big win, and I ate very well. We went to The RainForest Cafe for breakfast, where I had scrambled eggs, and a piece of bacon, with a few pieces of home potatoes. Lunch, I ate a Cauliflower patty, and a few fries. I finished with dinner of Claim Chowder. So, I was trying to be smart with my choices for meals. I didn’t really seem to enjoy any of them though. Another win, since food has always been a pleasure for me. I did have a few sips of Vietnamese coffee that Sarah got from the Lunar New Year booth. It was the first coffee I’ve had in months, and it was okay(I did also have a small cup this morning at home of instant). I think my journey with coffee is pretty much over, at least I’m okay with that.

It felt good to take this new lighter body out to something that would normally tax my body, and have this energy to just do more. I would have to take a break before we would get to the entrance of the park, the last several times we had visited. Amazing! We got in the rides that mattered to us, and we just had an over all great time. Sarah keeps telling me that she’s proud. It’s always better when you can have a great support system behind you. People really need to hear that they’re doing a good job. This doesn’t just go for your personal life, but getting that type of recognition of doing a good job at works, helps.

Since everything happened in a relatively short span, I’ll update everyone on a weight update next weekend. I think every other week tends to work better for me because there shows a noticeable change. It gives me some extra time to hit that 10,000 steps anyway. Besides, I still haven’t been cleared to go beyond light workouts still. Though my walks do feel like I could almost be pushing it, but they’ve been the easiest part so far.

Now, to change the subject, I’m currently trying to learn more about the various programs that I use for my filming, and continue to develop those skills. I’ll also be doing a few professional freelance videos in the next couple of weeks. I’m excited to get this experience under my belt, and I think it’ll help me out with some extra money to help get the equipment that I need to get a full production studio going.

Another subject that I’ve decided to focus as an area of study is Spanish. Living in California, it’s really handy to know, and besides that, bilingual is just another skill set that helps make myself more marketable with whatever profession I do. Right now, learning and adding skills, certs, etc…. is something that will help me better myself, and wasn’t the point, to improve myself?

Anyway, this looks like the end of another set of thoughts, so this is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Welcome To Club 100

So for the start of today’s blog, I’m going to educate the populace on what I had done and some of the facts about the procedure. According to the brochure at the doctor’s office, produced by Covidien the technical name for the gastric sleeve that I’ve been talking about over the last two months is the vertical sleeve gastrectomy, or partial gastrectomy. The procedure takes the cutting out of two-thirds of the stomach to make the stomach into a part of tube, or to make it look like a “sleeve”. This procedure also removes the part that produces a hormone called Ghrelin, which is the chemical that controls the cravings for being hungry.

At my highest weight, I was weighing in at 429.9 lbs. and at a hight of five-foot-ten, that put me at a body mass index of 61.7. The requirement is to have a BMI of 35, and I was well above that. I was on the cusp of having bad cholesterol, high blood pressure, and quite frankly, I was a prisoner in my own body(I’m sure I’ve said this a couple of times). heaviest

This was what I looked like at my heaviest. The worst part of all of this weight was when I would try to actually exercise, I would hurt. I had bruised my foot on a walk, my knees hurt, and it was just the most difficult thing when I moved. I truly felt that I was trapped in my own body and there wasn’t anything that I felt I could do to help me loose the weight. I was scared that I was going to put myself into an early grave.

I was doing well before I had my breakdown at work in 2013. I was on Weight Watchers and I had lost fifty-six pounds. 2 years after weight watchers

I was feeling good at the time, I felt free and with more energy, but then depression took over, and I gained it all back and then some. It was a rough time in my life, and my mind wasn’t right. I felt like I was the most worthless thing and I wanted to die. That actually followed me even when I was able to go back to work.

When I decided to go back to school in 2014, I was trying to change my life around. I didn’t realize for about the first year of school in what I was doing, and it took until about another half-year before I realized that what I needed in life was a better outlook on what life could and would end up being for me.

The first thing I did do, again without realizing the potential of what would come, was I decided that I would be a beacon of positivity. When I left work, there was negative people everywhere and it really helped to bring me down. The decision of being positive wasn’t for anybody else, except myself. I didn’t want to continue to feel worthless, and the new outlook helped me be a better person, not only with myself, but for other’s as well. That is something I continue to, and will continue to do for the rest of my life.

Finding that creative outlet was the best thing for me, I’ve been able to put forward the thoughts and revelations into something tangible, and that’s where things like this blog come in at. It seems like I’m in a constant state of thought, even when it’s at the worst times, like when I’m trying to sleep. Sometimes, it’s that state of restlessness  that helps some of my better ideas come out.

So, bringing this to a more present time period, when I got introduced to the idea of setting up a WordPress website, I decided that I would use the platform to blog. I figured that it would be a good way to share my experience, and hope that the words would find someone who might need to know that there’s other’s who have gone through the same kinds of issues they have, and that there is someone they could reach out too. I also fond it therapeutic for when I go through some of my emotional times. Though I suffer from depression, I don’t look at it as a weakness, but as a strength because I’ve survived the darkest of times. I’ve survived several times throughout my adult life. Now I’m here to help other’s who don’t know if they will make it, or if they just need some support and to be aware that things will get better.

With in the last year, the awareness that I’ve come across was that things were going to get better for me as I worked hard to finish school. I knew that I was setting myself and my family up for better things in life. I’ve been determined to make the best of life. As the months got closer to the end of my schooling, I was more determined to get done, and put what I earned to good use. I’ve been networking and planting the seeds for this better future.

Feb 3 stats

This is from my Pacer app. I went to my two month post operation check up and I weighed in at 360 lbs. It’s been a while there, and since it was out of town, I was determined to explore the city and get my 10,000 steps in today. I’ve got farther than I thought I would, and I’m glad that I have something to help record my progress. I think the most effective part is the fact that I’m obsessed with numbers, and this is a great way to keep track of the movements from my walks.

As I was walking with my wife downtown Lancaster, a thought came too me that I had never considered before- I invested in myself. Wow! I never considered something like that. Sure I’m going to have student loans, and the high cost of my weight loss surgery, but I had invested in myself. Physically, and mentally, I spent the money to help me find myself, and I’ve brought so many people with me for the ride. It took the surgery to help me not feel trapped anymore, and I want to keep pushing to get better. Then the school has helped me find the person that I was meant to be.

I think that’s the secret for people to be successful, and happy…invest in yourself, because the only person who’s going to take care of you in this life is you. You can only grow if you push yourself. That’s a thought to contemplate.

This is the director, Chris Keeling, I’m about seventy pounds lighter, and that’s a wrap.

You Can’t Catch The Time That Flew

What a weekend this has been! I can’t believe that I’ve been going strong all weekend long. Friday, we filmed. Saturday, we did a Parade of 1000 Flags, and an event for the Relay for Life, with a car show, and fund raiser. I only stated part way because I was uploading the dailies from Friday(which means a timeline of all the footage filmed), and I tried to get my homework for the week down. Today, we filmed, and I’m uploading my dailies from today, as a matter of fact, they are encoding right now.

So, with that being said, there were lesson learned this weekend from the director/filmmakers point of view. One, maybe plan on being on site a couple hours early, because things can take longer than expected, when getting started. It felt like we were running behind schedule every shoot day that we had. I think we could have better planned it, and maybe with more people with a larger skill pool might be able to get everything done on set sooner.

Second thing learned- it doesn’t hurt to quadruple check-in and make sure everyone is on the same page(I hate when people flake out). I get that this being a non-paid gig, might turn people off from working, but if you say that you will, please be a person of your word. I’m trying to get to the point of actually making money while doing this, and being able to pay people to film my projects.

Third, plan on filming only a few scenes per day, I think that what I was doing and with all the shots and angles, I felt like I didn’t quite get everything filmed the way I wanted, but at least I do have some good choices to pick from. I had to drop part of the scene, but having extra batteries and memory cards will help with that. I think we over worked the machinery.

Fourth, I discovered that I don’t have time for unprofessionalism on my set, while I love who I work with, I’m too focused to have to deal with people goofing off during filming. I mean seriously, I’m trying to make a name for myself, and this is my calling card to get there. Help me get my calling card and I’ll be able to pay you.

Fifth, with this crew I’m working with, I have a few new people and it really is becoming a well oiled team. I’m glad to bring in the people that I have. My cinematographer has brought an experienced eye to the game, and it’s seemed to bring my game up a bit, and I’m proud of the way we work together. I think it took to first day to find our rhythm, but I think we’re on the verge of getting things done at a better pace.

The final thing I’m really discovering is that post production is going to be the saving grace, because we can fix our mistakes there. Also, my cinematographer has experience there and we’ll be able to have a productive work flow there. I can’t say that I’ve ever been this excited and nervous about doing a project in my life. It started to feel a bit overwhelming, but I’ve gained confidence in the process and the support that I have behind me.

As a side note, learning the financial part of getting this movie made is also a wondrous experience, and this is something that I can put in my hat for the next big project. This is the director, coming off of the first week of filming #NashGray, and that’s a wrap.

Aw Man, What Was I Thinking

I’m glad the I decided to start my own production company. I love being my own boss, but a the same time, I’m looking to go out there and work for other people. Especially since I want the experience so that I can become a better filmmaker in my own right. I’ve gotten the chance to pick with kinds of projects that I work on, and this has been the most fun experience that I’ve had as a professional. There are days though that seem like they might just be too much.

Because I decided to go on in this business venture, it’s not been the easiest of choices. Now as I come to the closing chapters of my schooling and getting that degree, I’ve come to the point where I need to start focusing on becoming a business person as well. There have been challenges in this aspect, and I’m contemplating decisions that I might not like making, but it comes with the territory.

The other part of this is the fact that “anything worth doing, is never easy”. What truth that quote holds. You try and do the right thing, say like adopt a child in need. That’s difficult in and of itself. Deciding on a major career change, is a challenge when you’ve been doing something for so long, that is all you feel you’re qualified for.  Being in love and making that work, is not always the easiest thing to do either. Yet, there are reason’s that drive us to do these things.

Weight loss surgery is something else I’ve decided on, because being a person who feels trapped in a body that I didn’t bargain for is how I feel. I can’t move as much as I like, I hate the way I look in pictures, and I don’t like that all the clothes I can wear are expensive as hell. I don’t like looking at myself in the mirror. So, I have a very negative look on my own self image, and I hide it with an over confident attitude. It’s worked for me so far, and I know that charisma is something I do have.

I also know that these decisions that I’v made in the last few years are going to put me in a financial spot that I’m going to have to overcome, but I have faith that I will, because that’s always been the story of my life. I’ve got to have that drive to keep going, because I’ve got responsibilities, and that drive is always good for the artist. Yes, it may mean that I have to put that much extra work to get there, but I’ll do what I must.

So, this is my determination: I’m going to lose the weight and change my life style to maintain the weight loss. I’m going to do everything in my power to become the best damn filmmaker that I can. I’ll go ahead and do what I can to learn from professionals and craft my trade of choice. I can’t just let the haters win, who said that I needed to get real and go get a “practical job”. I need to get that career that betters my station and ignore the comments of being a part of the “hamburger brothers”.

I’m going to do this so that I can show my kids that it’s not bad to want something and work hard for it. I’ve always been able to make friends, and have some of the best people believe in me, so I don’t want to disappoint them, and I want to show them my gratitude for being the supports they are. I want to be able to provide better for my family because we should have to feel trapped in a situation that needs growth. I want to let my loved one’s know that I do love them, and I want to be there for them. I want to feel like a better person than I sometimes do.

While there are good things, I know that I’ve had many negative people come into my life and plant those seeds of doubt. I’m here to send them all away because all they’ve ever done was motivate me even more. Drive me more, make me successful, that’s what I want. I do what I have to, in both survival, and supporting my family. I will prevail.

This is the director and that is a wrap. https://igg.me/at/ZmRcVWz8R24/x/17178142 Support this.

Did I lose To a Time Lord?

Man, I can’t believe that this months is already half over. I would ask the typical question on where did the time fly too, but I can already answer that: I’ve been busy. That’s the crazy part, is that I’ve been busy, and I’m truly enjoying it.  I’ve been helping out with our Geeks United Against Cancer, and helping fund raise. I’ve been overly busy here in the studio, and all I can think is- Damn, this is fun.

Nash Gray, my fictional friend, we have been through so much together and all I can say is that I’m finally glad that I got your story done(at least I hope so). I’ve spent so much time rewriting and revising this screenplay that I hope with the resources we have available, that I finally can put the words to rest. Evilly, I won’t reveal the final script until we have it casted fully, but I’m glad to find more ways to tell Nash’s story. It also helped that I got some advice about filming from a friend, who reminded me of those valuable lessons learned about a year or so ago. I have a fault of not putting enough action into the writing, but can fill out that dialogue all day long.

You know that feeling you get when you realize something big is going to occur? Like the butterflies or the wiggly feelings inside. I got those today, and I look and see that I’m down to my last three and a half months of school. It’s crazy that I started this journey almost three years ago, and my life has been accelerated ever since. I can’t believe that it’s been over four years since my meltdown at work. Yet, I’ve come so far, and I’ve changed, for the better(or at least I think so). I’ve taken on responsibilities that I wouldn’t have ever dreamed of. I’ve built a reliable team to help complete the work that I have to do. These people seem to enjoy the process, and it gives them opportunities to gain experience that they probably wouldn’t have otherwise. The biggest experience is mine, as I learn to be a leader, as I learn to organize my life and the work I plan on doing for the rest of my life.

Speaking of the rest of my life. I find it odd that things that I wanted to do as a high schooler, have come back around in some way for where I decided to head in life. When I was in high school, I wanted to own my own production company, but I wanted it to be a music producer, as music will always be my first love. I discovered drama way after, but I found that I love it just as much.

I’m sure that I’ve mentioned that Sin City(2005), changed my life. I think it was creatively the most stunning movie(or it just looked really cool)(damn my comic book geekiness). I want to make something that cool. I love to write, and it’s funny because I hated English in high school. Being creative or performing, those are my drugs, and I love how they make me feel.

Remember that in three and a half months, things will be changing greatly for me. This is the Director and that’s a wrap.

Welcome to My Funeral, I Think I’ll Be Late.

Well, I guess that is an unusual title, but it’s more about mindset than actually dying…good God, I’m not ready for that, yet. I never tried hard in school when I was a kid, I always skated by with B’s and C’s. As long as I passed was all my parent’s worried about.  Too bad, that I didn’t take it upon myself to do better. I should have done better for me.

All I cared about was having fun, or at least between the time I wasn’t getting bullied or feeling lonely. I had more friends than I thought at the time, and I did okay. I just wanted to have fun and not worry about school. My, how things have changed though. Determination, maturity, and a bit of desperation are great motivators to get the ball rolling.

So the first change came about the time I was thirteen, it was February 29th, 1992. It was that extra day in the year that brought me more trouble than I was expecting. I had been rejected by a girl I liked and it bothered me. I was being a kid, who didn’t pay attention to any of the signs on a road that I traveled down most days on my bike. I ran a stop sign and was ran into by an oncoming truck. Being a kid, who needed a helmet and pads, right? Nothing ever touches a kid, right?

I hit the front end of the truck and roll up on the hood, when the truck stops, I fly about ten feet, yards, I’m not even sure, because I don’t remember any of it. I just pick up bits after I wake up from my comma. So, I fly and hit my head on the asphalt. I suffer from severe head trauma. Broken bones, oh so many broken bones, scares and asphalt embedded into my hand to remind me that I’m a stupid kid.

After about three weeks of a medicated comma, I ended up in rehab to get my abilities to do everything back.  I took a chunk out of my femur bone and had to have a steel rod put in place to help it heel, I had a cast on the right arm I broke, and my hip was broken in two places. I forgot to mention that it was on my right side. Thank God for that because I’m a lefty. Always about silver linings. The thing that changed about me the most, according to my parents, was that I had a major personality change. I used to be a softy at heart, and very emotional. I was a kind person. At least that’s the story, I’ve been told. Things went in the complete opposite direction for me after that.

I’m not saying that I became mean, though I can get that way(if you’ve been following along since the first blog, then you might have heard me mention being bullied a few times), but I was a bit tougher. I’m kind of a cynic, and I have a very crass sense of humor. Mom told me it was like I went to the dark side.

Over all, I like the person I am. I think it’s toughened me up for what this world really is, but I do care about people. I just don’t like to put up with bullshit. I don’t think most people do. Any way, to continue on….

I had to fight to get my grades back up. I had to relearn how to use the bathroom. All that fun stuff that comes out of rehab. I made it though. Some people where glad I came back to school, others not so much, but I was changed.

When your young, you tend not to appreciate the fight, and as I went to high school, I started slacking again, but I did graduate on the first try, even with a couple of close calls. Then I moved to California and took a year off, before I went back. Part of that reason was because my parent’s said that if I took a year off, I won’t go back, and surly I had to prove them wrong, I mean that is the kind of person I am.

I went to school, fell in love with two girls, at the same time, and I choose the wrong girl to marry, but I didn’t know that at the time. It was an interesting time in my life, and I’m far better from that situation as a person. Choosing the wrong mate, put me through a time of hell, and I ended up being a broken person because of it.  That was when the second girl I fell in love with came back into my life. I suffered PTSD from that first marriage, but Sarah came back into my life and saved me. It wasn’t long before we were pregnant, and then married. Second chances don’t come along often, but I was blessed with that.

After that situation took place, I went back to school, but just got burnt out. I crammed the last month of school into a week and a half because I got a job on the Disney film Holes(2003). I kept up with school for about a year more before I decided to just work and be a family man.

I had tried to do a few classes like pharmacy tech, and then an accountant, but I hadn’t found any of that satisfying, so I worked until my break down at work that took me on an extended vacation for seventeen months. During that time I was soul searching and trying to figure out what I wanted to do in life.  Learning that I needed to make the smart decisions and go for “real jobs”, but I never was satisfied with that either. About half way into my suspension from work, I decided to follow my dream and go to film school. By this time, I finally figured out that I was smart enough to do this and I felt that this was what I was meant to do.

Thank God for that, or I wouldn’t be sitting here blogging about my life, and the things I learned. I wouldn’t be here communicating and trying to build a name for myself. Every like, follow, and subscriber is a check in the win column for me. I love what I’m trying to build. I’ve never been more passionate, except about Superheroes and Star Wars, but I do really love what I’m working towards. I do love writing, and I’ve found my prose(google it). I think it works for me. I appreciate that I have a great group of supporters, and fans. Who would have ever thought?

Remember, I’m Chris Keeling, and I’m the Director, and if you like everything I do, like, subscribe, leave some words…. I like words. This is a wrap until next time folks.