Phase Two Has Started.

Holy crap! The Los Angeles Film School’s campus was cool. I enjoyed being there, and I felt sad at the same time because the student journey that I’d been going on for the last three years is finally coming to an end. I mean I seriously wish that I could have visited the campus far earlier, and maybe taken some of my classes there.

Onward and upward then, and with that being said. I got my cap and gown. I also got my tickets for the  graduation. So….my time as a student is at the end and now I’ll be an alumni. The next evolution in the world of Chris Keeling is getting ready to start. Again, today was constructive because I got to also see my career advisor, and she’s setting me on a path to correct my resume, and social media so that I can become more appealing to for my career, and get those jobs that pay money. My free lance work is showing me that I can do well with this and I’m excited to see where things will take me.

One of the tasks that I’ve been put to do, is to actually get a full production crew that I can constantly work with on a continuous basis, and I think that I can find these people. One day, we’ll all get paid and that’s a guarantee. For now, it’s more about getting the experience, and applying what experience I have so that I can develop more of what I need to appeal to the mass population.

My walk kicked ass as I burned well over  1,000 calories, and over 16,000 steps today. I think that I have similar numbers tomorrow as this weekend’s adventures are not quite over yet. I still have my three month check up that I’m doing in the morning, and I think a bit more shopping for a few things before I can leave.

On the weight loss journey front, I had some jerky today, it’s been a while and I was almost nervous that it wasn’t going to agree with my stomach today. Considering the calories that I did burn today, I’m pretty sure that I hadn’t consumed enough to worry about over doing my limit of calories today. Sarah says that I probably could have had a few more. Things are really looking up, and I plan on continuing what I’m doing.

Next month, we plan on really getting the hiking group going. Sarah is going to be bringing her camera to take pictures as she needs to fill up her portfolio just as much as I do. Exercise and work are going to be going hand in hand, and I can’t wait until we make money from both.

Anyway, this has been a long day, and I think I’m gonna call this one a wrap.

That New Feeling

I’ve gotten away from continually playing video games. Part of me feels like it’s a betrayal to the person known as Chris Keeling. Playing video games was my escape from the world, and I let the world pass me by for so long. Sure they have good stories and are a way to kill time, as I still play from time to time, but not like I used too.

My life has become a series of how I can improve myself. With the weight loss journey taking the forefront for the last few months, it’s felt good to push my body to a different and more active level. It feels better to move than it does to just stand, or sometimes sit down. Once I can get cleared to become more active, I’m sure I’m going to find more and various ways to torcher myself into a stronger body, with the help of a friend, who’s also a personal trainer. I will get cut, and look better than ever.

Something that I have been struggling with is my film career. I love having my own personal company that I’m trying to get going, it’s teaching me things about how to deal with a new business. Part of the struggle is in the fact that we’ve had to take some time and step back because we currently don’t have a studio, we have the site that we’re going to turn into the studio, but with my partner being very ill recently, and complications with one of his business ventures(yeah, that’s how we roll), things have gotten behind by quite a bit. I want to produce more content, and in a bad way, but I know that patience is what is needed. I’m not even sure if I’m trying to take on too much too soon, while looking for another means of employment to better help fund this creative venture that I’m under taking.

I’ve said this is my year, and I truly do believe that, so much has gone right so far. Even when things have gone to shit, I’ve still managed not to let it get in the way of the momentum that I have going already. Circumstances haven’t always been ideal for me in the last several months, but I’ve been able to overcome all the bumps in the road so far. If anything besides getting done with school, I’ve learned how to handle stress a bit better. I don’t freak out every time something doesn’t seem to go completely right.

I think the next thing that I really need to master is the art of organization. I wasn’t very good at it when I did real estate, I’d like to say that I’ve gotten better, but I know that I have to improve on it still. My desk is a somewhat disorganized mess, with notebooks with ideas everywhere. I think I remember reading somewhere that was a sign of intelligence. I can only hope that’s true.

I think I’m just learning how not to waste life, and appreciating things so much more. I do still like to spend time playing a game with my kids, because that’s one way we bound, but I find going out on walks with them in a one-on-one situation is something that helps bring us closer. I enjoyed the walk with my son the other day. Instead of talking about wrestling, we talked about the growth happening in our town, and future plans. We talked about how we were both going to do what we needed to get our goals achieved. He wants to cook. He loves to bake and barbecue. We’ve watched enough competition shows to have fallen in love with the idea of being creative while grilling the food.

Another thing that’s become kind of an adventure is finding alternative ingredients to replace the white sugar, flour, rice, and bread. we find Agave is an amazing replacement for sugar, and that coconut flour is a wonderful ingredient as well. It’s even better when it’s done to help “dad” live healthier. My kids rock like that, but then again so does my wife. She does more than she’ll ever realize. I love them all.

This is the director and that’s another wrap for the night.

My Marching Orders For The Day

Today, I went in for my annual physical(by annual, I use that term loosely). The last time I had my physical, my blood pressure was 135 over something and my heart was like 68 beats per minute. I was in a bad way the last time I had the check up, about two years ago. This time was different, I was 112 over something and my heart beat was around 58. It felt kick ass. I’m doing what I can to get healthier, but it’s not for work, it’s for myself, and for my family.

The first three days of my work week, I tend to slack a bit on my 10k steps but I did get on them yesterday, 10841 steps with 4.8 miles and 775 calories. I had done over 10k steps before noon today. As a matter of fact, I’m currently sitting at 14921 steps, 6.59 miles, and 954 calories. To be honest, I don’t think that I’m going to be doing much more today, except maybe steps across the house to the bathroom, because today was a lot of steps anyway, and I’ve done good so far.

I know that the next weekend is my three month check-up with the doctor, but my two week weigh-in commitments are going to continue and I will have an update this weekend. While I won’t blog the update tomorrow, you can get it here at: My twitter is the most updated spot to follow my weight loss journey. Also my Facebook page: is a good place to go for my journey as well, and I sometimes drop words bombs of inspiration.

I’m able to accept more types of food finally, lettuce doesn’t seem to hurt when I eat it anymore. It’s hard to believe that I’ve been without most of my stomach for three months, though if you ever look at how I eat anymore, you can tell. I can tell, and I feel so much better, and yes I know that I’ve said that at least a few times, but it’s true. I feel so much better, and I continue to improve by the day or week, and this month is going to be so fucking crazy that it isn’t even something I can completely comprehend at the moment.

So, I’m preparing to go to my campus at the end of next week to get my tickets, cap, and gown. Plus I get to see my career advisor, and we are going to discuss what I’m going to do with my degree. I’m not going to lie, but working a movie in Hollywood is kind of starting to appeal to me at the moment. Sure I still want to do my own movies, but getting paid, and experience is always great as well.

Then the next day I go see the doctor, and I’m eager to get cleared to do regular workout, because my friend from a local MMA gym is going to help me get in “fighting shape”, and I can’t wait, it’ll help for when we do stunts on film, and will help me out with other aspects of my professional life.

Speaking of my professional life, I finally got my first freelance gig, and I’m excited to be working on this new experience. My client and I have been exchanging some ideas on how we are going to present our project. This has also helped me to get back to the creative flow of things and I’ve knocked out seventeen pages on the original script I was going to use as a student film. Once we did Nash Gray, I decided that I wanted to restart the whole script, because, well, I have become a better writer(largely due to the blogging). I’ve taken it in a direction that I hadn’t quite done before, and I’m beyond what I had originally had completed. I’m still working on that, as with going between the various other scripts I got going. Maybe, I’m trying to do too much at once, but I guess that I won’t know until I try.

Now that I’ve been out of school for a few months, and I’ve adjusted to my new body better, I’m finally finding my place in getting my shit together and pursuing my career as a filmmaker. Still, it’s all still kind of a new experience to me, and I pray that I don’t fuck it up. Though, I’m sure I will somewhere, and it’ll add a valuable experience to what I’m doing.

While this is the end and I’m about to wrap it up, I want to take a few moments and give thanks to all my new followers on WordPress, Instagram, Facebook, Google+, and Tumblr. I’ve truly enjoyed sharing my experiences with everyone, and hope that motivation has been found in the words that I’ve typed. Please keep it up, and don’t be afraid to comment. Dialogue is a great way to learn more about each other, and keep the discussion going.  With that said, this is the director and that’s a wrap.

February’s Almost Over!?!

What a month this has been… Now I’m preparing for a busy March, as I have graduation, a Vegas trip, and Wonder Con, all within a few week period. This is right after I have my three month check up for my weight loss journey.

This was the four days with the weekend, which started Thursday after work. I averaged over 10k steps all for days. It’s nice to see that also on average I was burning around 700 plus calories. So far for the first days of the work week, I haven’t even come close, but as I get more time during the weekend, I’ll push those numbers up a bit.

Let’s get into how my up coming weeks are looking as well. This week, I should be doing a bit of freelance work, I’m looking forward to getting the experience from that, as I really like my client because he has a personality on him.

Next week though is where everything gets interesting, as in I’m going to Los Angeles to finally walk on the campus of the school I’d been going too for the last three years. I have to pick up my cap and gown, plus get the tickets for the ceremony for the week after that. Then we’ll do lunch with my parents and kids, before heading out to Las Vegas for an adult weekend. With a return to work on Monday morning, just so we can leave on Thursday with the kids for Wonder Con, and a weekend of geeking out, plus I’m still getting my Geekultural Experience going.

This year really has started out great, and it just keeps getting better, even if we’ve had a few hiccups here and there. I think the further I go into this week, the better things are going to get. I’ve gotten heads up on something that’s exciting, but that’ll have to wait for another blog…

I also put in for my annual physical, which if truth be told, I totally avoided last year as it was. On the plus side, my results will be way better than the last one I had. I’m not going to complain. I think it’ll be done quickly, but it’s also going to fill up my already busy schedule. At least I can do it on a day off. One of the things I’ve always hated was fasting for a blood test, though it’s not going to be a problem this time. Since I did lose two-thirds of my stomach.

The other thing  I realize more everyday, is that I really need to have better time management skills. It seems like my walking and exercising has taken up most of my concentration, and I’ve got about a thousand other things that I’m trying to get done at the same time. I think I’m going to dedicate Wednesday’s the day that I spend on my writing. That would give me something to get those scripts worked on going. So much to get done, and it never seems like enough time to get it completed.

Saturday, I’ll have an update on my weight loss journey, and with that, this is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Size 54, No More, Paging Number 46

The crazy part about this morning is that I wanted to try on some jean pants, and we found some of my old shorts that were a size forty-six. Now before I continue this, let me tell you that I’ve been wearing basketball shorts for the last seven years, and had worn jeans few times up until 2014…I think. Anyway, I tried these shorts on and they were kind of loose. I don’t know if it’s because they were old, but I couldn’t fit into a size like that comfortably last year.

A win is a win, and I will take it. Sarah says that she can tell that I’m starting to feel “sexy”, and I must say that I do feel damn good about myself. It’s amazing what a bit of weight loss does for the confidence level. I haven’t weighed myself this week, because if you remember, I did say that I was going to only do the weigh in every other week. I can’t wait until I’m on the other side of 300. It’ll be nice to be my early adult weight again.

It feels strange that I’m starting to swim in my clothes, and I’m not going to go crazy and buy a completely new wardrobe quite yet, but I have been thinking of a getting a new outfit, something probably different than just a superhero shirt and shorts. I feel like I want to start dressing a little bit better on occasion, especially since Sarah tends to dress nice on date nights, and I’m looking like I always do. I appreciate that she says I look handsome all the time, but I feel that I could present myself a bit better for her.

Besides that, I should say that I’ve been busy getting the professional side of my life straightened out. I’m going to my school in two Fridays to pick up my stuff for when I walk down for my graduation, I’ll probably take the time to see my career advisor while I’m there. I finally got a rough draft of my newest resume for said film career done, and turned it in tonight. I hope that it’s something that we can work with to make better. Besides that, I also have another job lead that I’ve been looking to go towards for the better part of six years, I hope that I can hit up the application when it comes out so that I can fill it out, and hopefully get the job, that I went to school for.

I’ve taken the undertaking of trying to learn Spanish, so that I can become bi-lingual. It’ll help in communicating in general, especially since I do customer service type work, and it doesn’t hurt that I’ve got a goal to write a script in both English and Spanish as it’s about a Latina and her boyfriend(who isn’t Latino), and the plight that they go through being a bi-racial couple. I was an idea that I thought up a while back, and I thought it would be a nice challenge…. That’s something I like as a writer, is challenging myself. I really gets my creativity going, and as I get things going, I’ve got so much that I’ve already started, now it’s finding the time to concentrate on on script at a time, but I don’t want to loose the ideas, once I get them. I used to have these great ideas when I was younger, but I never wrote them down, and I would forget them over time.

I think that’s part of the reason I decided to keep learning, so that I could gain tools to help me out and be a better individual, between the Spanish, and learning things about getting that dream job, and then the videos to help me learn the software programs that I’m using or going to be using as I make movies, I’m staying busy, and I haven’t really played video games much lately. I have been watching more movies though.

On top of all of those things, blogging is helping me become a better writer, and I used to think that 500 words was kind of a challenge to come up with.  It’s funny because I’ve seen where the growth of my words have gone since I started this WordPress page for a class a couple of years ago. I was averaging about 400 words, then last year I was about 460. Now I average around 650 or something like that. Plus, my audience’s growing and my like are far higher now than they have been for the blogs I’ve had over the last two years. The only thing that’s down is the comments, I haven’t had somebody comment on the page itself. I think that I’m finally finding that niche as a blogger, and with all the projects that I’ve got going, I’m sure that I won’t be running out of any content to produce any time soon. Especially once we can get working on the studio, things kind of went south on movement there, but with a year of uncertainty, I don’t find that a bad thing at this time.

Self improvement is a key to success and I would like to see people succeed, keep on the journey of self discovery, you might surprise yourself. This is the director and that’s a wrap.

10 Years And More Paperwork!

So, I have to do paperwork because I’ve been at my job for ten years. Being the well oiled machine that I work for, I’m having to answer things from years ago, and then there are things that I don’t ever think that I knew. All I can think is man…..I’ve been doing this for way too long.

It’s given me a time to reflect on where my life has been, and where I’m going. The past is a bit blurry because I’ve not always handled life in the best ways possible, but as I’ve gotten older, and gained tools, I’m getting better at it. I’ve hit a few very dark times, and part of doing this paper work has caused me to try and remember through those dark clouds. I’d like to say those thoughts are sunshine and rainbows, but a rain cloud with thunder and lightning would fit that much better.

“It builds character,” or so that’s what they saying goes. It proves that I’m a survivor, even if it fucked me up a bit along the way. I’m a survivor…that’s the key there. Even when I wanted life to end, or wanted to hide away and disappear, I made it through those times, and I’m better for it. I’ve gotten married to a great lady, who loves and supports me, and we’ve had some great kids together, who I’ve not always been the best towards as well. We’re not perfect, but I love this family of mine.

“It builds character,” at least I’ve been able to analyze this and help it become something more positive in my life. Being someone who’s had insecurity issues and depression issues throughout my life, has built a thicker skin than when I was a child. I’ve heard the insults that people have said about me behind my back, and to my front. Most of the time I laugh because I think of how lame some of the words are. I think to myself, can’t you come up with something a bit better than that? Hamburger boy? Fatty Mc Fat Fat… whatever fucking insult they make to have a laugh. If it was me, I’d go for the jugular, and that’s the sad part, because that’s what my situation molded me to be when I was younger. I know that I have a mean streak and a low tolerance of bullshit, but I do try to not let that side out most of the time.

“It builds character,” and that’s true. I think that it’s all in how we decide to let it form us. At a low point, I finally decided that I was going to do everything that I could so that I could be a beacon of positivity in this world. Too many want to beat other’s down because, like they say, “misery, loves company.” I think that’s too true, and I don’t want to be the one to add to that problem. The funny part is that during my last “dark time”, I was hating everything and everybody, myself especially. Some would think that I’m being positive for other people’s sakes, though the truth is that I’m doing it for me, because I don’t want to ever feel the way I did before. Plus I’m starting to get this feeling that the world gives back to you what you project, and I’m wanting to feel positive vibes instead of the negative vibes that I had felt.

I’m feeling the balance between mind and body these days. The focus is getting stronger, and the  motivation is being felt by others as well(see several previous post). Well, I have so much more info to get before I can finish my paperwork, and I’ve got some studying to do as well.  So this is the director and that’s a wrap.

Let’s ‘Drop It Like It’s Hot’

I hit the 10,000 steps two days in a row, and almost did for a third day, but the average was over that 10k mark for sure. With that being said, I’ve kind of chilled the last two days to give myself a rest. I feel like I push myself ragged at times, which makes it harder for me to focus on the studious aspect of my life. The results are good though very good.

Remember when I talked about my start on this weight loss journey that my highest weight was 429.9 lbs? Breaking down the science of fat content, that and the fact that I’m 5’10(I think my weight shrunk me a bit), that equals out to a Body Mass Index of 61.7. That means that 61.7% of my body was covered by fat, and that’s what caused me to feel like a prisoner in my body. It also explains why it was harder for me to be cold(well insulated for sure).

I went in and weighed myself yesterday, and I discovered that I’ve lost another 7.6 lbs, which puts me at the weight of 352.4. My BMI is now at 50.6 and the total is now at 77.5 lbs, and with that, I feel accomplished.352.4

Yep, that’s me! When it’s compared to how I was looking, people say they see the loss in the face, and neck….what I notice in this pic is how much belly has gone, and even looking down I see that it’s missing. It’s fantastic not feeling like the Kool-aid man. People tell me to keep it up and not to stop. Believe me, there’s no chance in that. Realize that I did, get part of my body removed to help get me going on the right path, and I’m determined not to stay fat. I like not hurting or struggling when I move. That’s the biggest part of the win so far.

Second win goes to the people who seemed to be inspired by this journey that I’ve undertaken, as I’m recruiting people to do some hikes with me and the family. I think it’ll be a great bonding experience, and honestly, other’s wanting to take my example and get heathy too, is one of the most amazing feelings to me as well.

The weight loss has really helped my mental health as well, with the compliments, more self confidence comes into play. Plus I don’t feel like I loathe myself anymore.  I can’t think of anything better then all the positives that are coming out of these life changes. I’ve discovered that there are still a few things that upset my stomach, but I’m also trying to be conscious about not trying to stretch it out. I miss some of the spices that I love so much, but I’m sure I’ll be able to eat those again someday, and I’m at about the two and a half month mark out from my surgery.

I might just make that hundred pound mark with in the next few months. I haven’t seen three hundred in about seventeen years, and it would be incredible to make that half-way-point in my ultimate goal weight. Right now, my smaller goal is 339.5. Once I reach that, I’ll plan on making a goal of about 296, which was the weight I was when I was married to my first wife, in 2001. I get excited about those kinds of thoughts. I get excited to know that I won’t be fat for the rest of my life, and that my life won’t be as short as it was probably going to end up had I not done something to take the control back.

It’s sad to think that I got to a point where I thought that I was going to die, and I’ll be honest, I welcomed it for a time there. I stopped caring, and I was just going to let life happen to me, and I didn’t care when or where it would happen. Now, it’s different. Now I have the power, and I like to move, and get those steps in. Soon, I’ll be able to push myself again, and I can’t weight to add weights into my routine. I’ve always loved weight lifting, and I’ll feel more comfortable on the machines that I’m going to use. I’ll get in the sit-ups, push-ups, and a faster mile. This in vain of what I do for work, and I could promote, but I don’t really have the drive to continue with the current track for my career. I want to move onto something that give me a chance to use the more creative part of my brain.

The reward, would be the fact that I could do it if I chose too. I’ve come a long way in the last year, and I’m all about self improvement these days. I’ve got the best support system that I think any person could ask for, and it’s a blessing that it helps to keep me motivated. Though the real trick is that I’m keeping myself motivated. I have my bad days, but I stay motivated. I think that’s how I’m learning to survive, is by staying motivated, and positive. Getting the mind and body in harmony is the secret.

Anyway, this is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Disneyland-Pushed Twice As Hard

So, my wife and I decided that we would make up our sixteenth anniversary, which happened in July of last year, by going to Disneyland, without the kids. Yes, I do realize that seven months is a long time to postpone our celebration, but I was working on a movie at that time, and we just ended up being busy with life through a lot of that. It’s nice when we get some time where the two of us can just be a couple. Having kids, that gets hard to do, especially when they tend to be needy.


So to say the least, I got my 10,000 steps before eleven-o-clock. I best part is that I made it so long without having to take a break. I didn’t really slow down until about four in the afternoon, by then I think I was around 15,000 steps, but it was so worth the effort put forth. I can’t believe that I had made almost ten miles, it’s crazy to think that I made it that far.

In contrast, today I’ve only gone about 5,945 steps. I think that I deserve a break from that kick ass effort from yesterday, but I do plan on challenging myself like that again soon. Perhaps during a long hike or something, but then again, I might need more time before I do that.

The biggest highlights of yesterday was that I didn’t struggle to get through any of the turn styles, or on the rides, I wasn’t uncomfortable. That’s a big win, and I ate very well. We went to The RainForest Cafe for breakfast, where I had scrambled eggs, and a piece of bacon, with a few pieces of home potatoes. Lunch, I ate a Cauliflower patty, and a few fries. I finished with dinner of Claim Chowder. So, I was trying to be smart with my choices for meals. I didn’t really seem to enjoy any of them though. Another win, since food has always been a pleasure for me. I did have a few sips of Vietnamese coffee that Sarah got from the Lunar New Year booth. It was the first coffee I’ve had in months, and it was okay(I did also have a small cup this morning at home of instant). I think my journey with coffee is pretty much over, at least I’m okay with that.

It felt good to take this new lighter body out to something that would normally tax my body, and have this energy to just do more. I would have to take a break before we would get to the entrance of the park, the last several times we had visited. Amazing! We got in the rides that mattered to us, and we just had an over all great time. Sarah keeps telling me that she’s proud. It’s always better when you can have a great support system behind you. People really need to hear that they’re doing a good job. This doesn’t just go for your personal life, but getting that type of recognition of doing a good job at works, helps.

Since everything happened in a relatively short span, I’ll update everyone on a weight update next weekend. I think every other week tends to work better for me because there shows a noticeable change. It gives me some extra time to hit that 10,000 steps anyway. Besides, I still haven’t been cleared to go beyond light workouts still. Though my walks do feel like I could almost be pushing it, but they’ve been the easiest part so far.

Now, to change the subject, I’m currently trying to learn more about the various programs that I use for my filming, and continue to develop those skills. I’ll also be doing a few professional freelance videos in the next couple of weeks. I’m excited to get this experience under my belt, and I think it’ll help me out with some extra money to help get the equipment that I need to get a full production studio going.

Another subject that I’ve decided to focus as an area of study is Spanish. Living in California, it’s really handy to know, and besides that, bilingual is just another skill set that helps make myself more marketable with whatever profession I do. Right now, learning and adding skills, certs, etc…. is something that will help me better myself, and wasn’t the point, to improve myself?

Anyway, this looks like the end of another set of thoughts, so this is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Welcome To Club 100

So for the start of today’s blog, I’m going to educate the populace on what I had done and some of the facts about the procedure. According to the brochure at the doctor’s office, produced by Covidien the technical name for the gastric sleeve that I’ve been talking about over the last two months is the vertical sleeve gastrectomy, or partial gastrectomy. The procedure takes the cutting out of two-thirds of the stomach to make the stomach into a part of tube, or to make it look like a “sleeve”. This procedure also removes the part that produces a hormone called Ghrelin, which is the chemical that controls the cravings for being hungry.

At my highest weight, I was weighing in at 429.9 lbs. and at a hight of five-foot-ten, that put me at a body mass index of 61.7. The requirement is to have a BMI of 35, and I was well above that. I was on the cusp of having bad cholesterol, high blood pressure, and quite frankly, I was a prisoner in my own body(I’m sure I’ve said this a couple of times). heaviest

This was what I looked like at my heaviest. The worst part of all of this weight was when I would try to actually exercise, I would hurt. I had bruised my foot on a walk, my knees hurt, and it was just the most difficult thing when I moved. I truly felt that I was trapped in my own body and there wasn’t anything that I felt I could do to help me loose the weight. I was scared that I was going to put myself into an early grave.

I was doing well before I had my breakdown at work in 2013. I was on Weight Watchers and I had lost fifty-six pounds. 2 years after weight watchers

I was feeling good at the time, I felt free and with more energy, but then depression took over, and I gained it all back and then some. It was a rough time in my life, and my mind wasn’t right. I felt like I was the most worthless thing and I wanted to die. That actually followed me even when I was able to go back to work.

When I decided to go back to school in 2014, I was trying to change my life around. I didn’t realize for about the first year of school in what I was doing, and it took until about another half-year before I realized that what I needed in life was a better outlook on what life could and would end up being for me.

The first thing I did do, again without realizing the potential of what would come, was I decided that I would be a beacon of positivity. When I left work, there was negative people everywhere and it really helped to bring me down. The decision of being positive wasn’t for anybody else, except myself. I didn’t want to continue to feel worthless, and the new outlook helped me be a better person, not only with myself, but for other’s as well. That is something I continue to, and will continue to do for the rest of my life.

Finding that creative outlet was the best thing for me, I’ve been able to put forward the thoughts and revelations into something tangible, and that’s where things like this blog come in at. It seems like I’m in a constant state of thought, even when it’s at the worst times, like when I’m trying to sleep. Sometimes, it’s that state of restlessness  that helps some of my better ideas come out.

So, bringing this to a more present time period, when I got introduced to the idea of setting up a WordPress website, I decided that I would use the platform to blog. I figured that it would be a good way to share my experience, and hope that the words would find someone who might need to know that there’s other’s who have gone through the same kinds of issues they have, and that there is someone they could reach out too. I also fond it therapeutic for when I go through some of my emotional times. Though I suffer from depression, I don’t look at it as a weakness, but as a strength because I’ve survived the darkest of times. I’ve survived several times throughout my adult life. Now I’m here to help other’s who don’t know if they will make it, or if they just need some support and to be aware that things will get better.

With in the last year, the awareness that I’ve come across was that things were going to get better for me as I worked hard to finish school. I knew that I was setting myself and my family up for better things in life. I’ve been determined to make the best of life. As the months got closer to the end of my schooling, I was more determined to get done, and put what I earned to good use. I’ve been networking and planting the seeds for this better future.

Feb 3 stats

This is from my Pacer app. I went to my two month post operation check up and I weighed in at 360 lbs. It’s been a while there, and since it was out of town, I was determined to explore the city and get my 10,000 steps in today. I’ve got farther than I thought I would, and I’m glad that I have something to help record my progress. I think the most effective part is the fact that I’m obsessed with numbers, and this is a great way to keep track of the movements from my walks.

As I was walking with my wife downtown Lancaster, a thought came too me that I had never considered before- I invested in myself. Wow! I never considered something like that. Sure I’m going to have student loans, and the high cost of my weight loss surgery, but I had invested in myself. Physically, and mentally, I spent the money to help me find myself, and I’ve brought so many people with me for the ride. It took the surgery to help me not feel trapped anymore, and I want to keep pushing to get better. Then the school has helped me find the person that I was meant to be.

I think that’s the secret for people to be successful, and happy…invest in yourself, because the only person who’s going to take care of you in this life is you. You can only grow if you push yourself. That’s a thought to contemplate.

This is the director, Chris Keeling, I’m about seventy pounds lighter, and that’s a wrap.

Positive Vibes All The Way

As I sit here after my record breaking walk tonight for my recorded steps, I must admit that I’m feeling a bit tired, and with me pushing myself to get steps in at work, this week has been challenging. I feel good about it, and I’m keeping the momentum going.27072514_2009373432651588_3791808181196663298_n

I’m starting to feel so much better physically, and tonight I have this burning fire inside, and it’s hard to contain the energy that I feel. I’m also starting to feel better spiritually, and as I continue to grow in the outer and inner, I’m feeling satisfied with life.

My personal life has gotten so much better over the past year, my love for my wife is strong, my love for the special people in my life has ignited the zeal that I have. I feel like I’m becoming a better father to my children, and a better friend to those I have in my life. If this feeling lasts, I can only imagine that I’ll start to soar with the choices that I’m making.

As I’ve said before, I know my professional life is going to be on point this year, I’ve seemed to make some really good decisions with whom I’ve been in contact with and networking, and it’s even more amazing to figure out where the unlikely connections are coming from. This is finally my time to shine and set an example to my children that life can be what you want it to be.

I don’t know if it’s just the Bruno Mars music that I’m playing, but right now I can’t believe how good I’m feeling inside, and I really just want to take this feeling and share it with everyone. I feel like I wasted so much time not being happy with myself, and life is a treasure. I’ve come a long way from a few years ago when I wanted things to end. When I was feeling hopeless, and lost. Now that’s not the case, and thank God, because I’m happy with life.

Tomorrow, I get to have a day of quiet and I think I’ll take the opportunity get my creative flow going. I imagine that I’ll knock out some decent content for one of my scripts, and get some reading done to help inspire me. I can’t wait to see what I do come up with tomorrow. I’m one of those writer’s that I kind of feel that I let the story tell itself, and I can’t wait to see where my character’s are going to go, and experience.

I’m glad that tomorrow is my technical “Friday” because I’ve got plans for the weekend, and one is going to my two month check up, as well as pushing those 10,000 steps again, and I know that as I push, it’ll get easier to achieve those goals. I wonder where I’ll be in a year from now? How many pounds will I lose? How much will get filmed by then, can I knock out those projects that I’ve been planing on? I’m sure it’s going to be an exciting adventure to get there.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Twelve Years To The Day

Today is my son’s twelfth birthday, and while I sit hear and reflect on the years he’s been in my life, I thought that I would dedicate this blog to him, on his day. I’m proud of the man he’s becoming, and I’ve loved watching the growth within him as a person. Here’s to the awesome person that he is:

At this time in my life, I was a young and recently new Realtor in the real estate business. I had gone on to get my license and thought that this was the what I was going to do the rest of my life. Sarah was babysitting and we were doing okay financially at the time. Autumn, my eldest daughter was an independent three year old, whom I was I thinking might be our only child. I would have been okay with that because, she’s an amazing kid, and I love her with all my heart.

Being new, maybe a couple of months in to starting my new career field, Sarah had told me that she was sensitive in her chest, that was when I told her to be careful for a few days and see if that issue would go away. After several days, we decided to go ahead and get her a pregnancy test, which was ended up positive. My good friend Terry had been hanging out with us that day. So, he got the news at the same time that I did.

Now, Sarah had hyperemesis, when she was pregnant the first time with Autumn. In layman terms means that she had nine months of twenty-four hour pregnancy sickness. We thought that this was going to be different, but Murphy’s law came into effect. I mean, why not? It wasn’t like we were trying to get our lives together and my career was already set, but yes, it was worse than the our first pregnancy. Sarah ended up losing her job, and I was at the hospital with her almost the whole time. What a training regiment that ended up being for me as a Realtor.

Fast forward to January 28th, 2006- At around midnight we get to the hospital and by five-twenty-four, our little boy was born. That was the fastest birth I’d ever witnessed, and he had come six weeks earlier than expected. He stayed in the maternity ward for three weeks. This was a hard time in life, but I was glad to have my son, and Autumn got to go in and hold her baby brother as well.

Another jump in time, and I’ve got to say that Christopher Alexander Keeling II is a special boy. No, it’s not just because he’s my son, but on his own he shows so much more than I could ever expect from a young man. We discovered that he was Autistic when he was six years old. That explained the quarks we didn’t think anything of at that time in his life. He also has a learning delay, yet, he has a brilliant mind. Some of the things he says blows my mind that a kid his age would even think about.

One of the things we share is a love of music, at the age of two, he was into Sinatra and the whole crooner thing. He also has a love of Queen, which was something he reacted too while still in the womb. He loves his video games, wrestling, and super heroes. His favorites are the Flash and the Hulk. Very different characters, from the opposite sides of the spectrum.

What I personally think is awesome is how supportive he’s been, especially in my well being. He makes sure to check to see if I’m eating okay, reminds me to exercise, and he’s been supportive of my school journey as well. He’s even fascinated with wanting to help with the film company, which he’s ran the camera for me on a few little things here and there. He even filmed a shot for Nash Gray.

Sure, we play video games together and, enjoy our music and movies. However it’s the fact that he’s so health conscious that really fascinates me. He doesn’t eat a lot of junk, and he’s giving up on soda. He really is a supporter of his dad getting healthy and living a long life.

Even though he has Asperger’s, he’s well liked among his peers, and our family friends, think he’s awesome. I’m proud of the man he’s becoming, because he show’s concern for other’s, and I’m amazed by the progress he’s gone through in his academic life. I love my children, and I’m glad that I can celebrate his day with him. This is the director, and that’s a wrap.


So, to start out, this was my last day of work this week, and I made it! With my uniform swimming on me. I’m in the need of a new belt to hold up those Genie pants. My lunch has changed so much since I first started working.  Work Lunch

This is what I take with me for a ten hour day to eat anymore. Sometimes it’s more than enough. I think that it’s crazy where I’m at, compared to as where I had been.

As my wife hasn’t been feeling the best today, we decided to go out to a local restaurant called Pita Fresh. I’m a huge fan of Shawarma, so my meal was Chicken Shawarma, with Couscous, olives, and Tahini sauce.Dinner before I ate

This is a picture of my bowel, it’s kind of big, and full of delicious food. I used to be able to destroy a meal like this and not think anything of it. That’s actually how I was several months ago, but this is what my meal looked like after I was done:after I ate

It’s funny that I barely made a dent. At least this can keep me going for a few days. The struggles of a fat person.  I’m satisfied with that, and today was an inspired day. Better food, better movement, and better activity.

So today I did over 10,000 steps, that’s over 4 miles. Here’s the proof:Steps for the day

Since I had started this journey this time, and the surgery, I’ve never made it quite this high. Last highest was like 9,141 steps. Crazy how I walked almost five fucking miles. I was motivated like crazy, I wanted to get to the 10,000 mark, and I was walking with a fiery purpose.

One of the best feelings is knowing that I can and want to move faster. I even jogs for a few steps, but I’m not ready for that quite yet. This week was the first week back at work, and I decided that I wanted to know how I was going to feel after work this week, but I do plan on getting back to the gym after work, a few days a week. I think I’m ready to take this to the next step.

I’ve had two other people express the interest of my progress and asked about the surgery, I’m glad that people want to get their body’s healthy, and I gave the number to West Medical to a co-worker yesterday. I hope that this helps my co-worker out in the most positive of ways. I’m the first to say that this hasn’t been an easy journey, but I’ve met some wonderful people because of this, and I think the rocky waves are over for the majority of my progress. All I have to do is keep my mind focused on the mission and go towards the goals.

I’m also happy that this little blog has gotten some attention, and I’m glad to get new followers. It’s my way of giving my voice to the same situations that people may be afraid or embarrassed to discuss. You can see more of the visuals on my Instagram page : This shows my weight loss journey, as well as my adventures with my family, and friends. They mean so much to me, and this is part of the reason why I’m taking the path that I’m doing now. Please feel free to ask questions, or just say something to be apart of the discussion.

The CK Project is a platform to help me be better at life and health, and I hope that it motivates others to do the same. I’ve had several people tell me that, and it brings such joy to have been able to help. I’m all about the positivity now, even though I have moments where it doesn’t seem enough to stay that way(after all, we all have bad days).

I’ve been on the negative side of life, and it sucks, but by doing this, I think that it’s starting to define the person I am, because the bad things help create character, and it’s like I didn’t really start finding out who I was until I hit the later part of my thirties. This is the person I want to be, and I’m not letting the hate and negativity define who I am.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

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