Let’s Get Caught Up

Wow, it’s been a while since I last blogged. So much has happened. For one I did start a blog last month about it being my two-year-anniversary since my weight loss surgery, and how it changed my life, but life got in the way with other things, and I became less motivated to finish that blog.

With that being said, I figured that I would turn this into a hodgepodge of several things in a blog and cover all my bases.

I had my two-year-anniversary since I had my gastric sleeve done, and so far I’ve teetered between around 167, and 169 pounds being gone. That’s not bad by all means, but being at a plateau like that since May has been a bit discouraging.

In the last few months I’ve started training a bit differently and going from weight training to body weight training. It’s different, and feels more challenging for me. I do still get in the weights from time to time, but I prefer this new type of training because it seems to hit the muscles down deeper.

Part of the changes that have happened is that I have become more aware of my body. I realize the spots that have weakness, and I try to be a bit more mindful when they start to hurt. Stretching is one of those ways that I try to compensate for some of the issues. My left knee is usually the one thing I can’t ever seem to get completely stretched out. I’ve had to find a few different positions to get that right stretch in.

So, this brings me up to the things that I wanted to get caught up on for  the new year. I’ve started a food journal on Tumblr, and I find that it is keeping me a bit more honest than I thought. I defiantly consider more about what it is that I’m eating, and I hope that this is one way that helps get me back on the path of losing weight. This is also something that I’ll be adjusting and evolving as I go along. Right now, I just keep track of what I’m eating, and soon I’ll be adding calorie, carb, protein count into the mix. The bright side of this is that I’ve been constant over the last few days.

On the opposite end of this, is the fact that when I was doing Weight Watchers, I hated keeping track of what I would eat. I started out doing well, but it just kind of fell out of the way. I guess that it helps I’m in a different spot mentally.

Out of all the changes in my body since I’ve been working out, I feel that my shoulders have defiantly shaped up the most nicely, and I can’t weight until my stomach gets a bit flatter. I’ll have to talk to the doctor about the skin removal surgery in ten days, which will also be my forty-first birthday. I’ve been seeing some of the skin removal results from fellow weight loss people, and I’m still a bit nervous about this whole thing.

I think that’s where the vanity comes in. I’ve got surgical scars, but I’m not looking forward to having more, especially some that would literally be right under my nose. I know that for health and comfort, it’s probably the best decision and I can’t wait until I can fit in clothes better. I’m just not excited for the eye sore that will come from the end product. I’m also not looking forward to the recovery process, and I’m gathering how bad it’s going to be.

It’s strange because when I had two-thirds of my stomach removed, the recovery time wasn’t as bad as it could have been. The first month was hard, but it got so much easier as I went along, and the first month was the hardest part, both physically and mentally. the mental part is what surprised me the most.

So, as we continue on with this blog, it’s a new year. I’m not going to say the generic, “New year, new me,” statement because I actually have come to dislike it. I figure if you’re going to change habits, and be a better person, then why wait? Just do it! Start the change now, and keep it going into the new year. The whole concept of the new year is wiping the slate clean, just kind of baffles me anymore. It’s just another day, and things are going to continue the way you choose to handle them. All a new year does is give you a new number to deal with.

However, with that being said, this year is going to prove to be a step in the right direction as it is. With the shameless cross promoting that I do, we are striking the right cords to get Luckey Bom Films going with three projects in the works, and Unexpected Side Trip seems to keep getting pushed back for financial reasons, we’ll be hitting up the crowdfunding soon enough. I’m excited because it’s just one of the scripts that I completed last year. I’ve finished a second draft of Life Happens and I’m excited because I’m getting in front of the camera for that one. It’s a bit bitter sweet because I had been working on the idea for the last four years, and to finally see the story fleshed out feels like an accomplishment. It’s also the longest script I have done so far.

The final script that I’ve been developing is a rehash of the first short that I ever did, Appreciate What You Got. It’s one that I was inspired to create a character off of an amazing young lady the I had gotten to know through interactions at work, and it was the first short I ever developed. The original project showed me a glimpse of what I was starting to get myself into, and fortified my passion as a story teller.

One of the exciting things about all my stories so far, is that with my friend Ed, who played Nash Gray, and has let me use some of his creative properties to help tell stories, i.e. Nash Gray, Unexpected Side Trip; has helped me come up with the idea that I should have my own shared universe. That is something that I’ve been able to do, and is something that as a writer I find exciting when I can start tying things in together.

I’ve also got some other things planned in between projects that I’ll be doing, I just have to wait before I say too much about that.

The CK Project  is also getting some love this year, as the podcast is gaining momentum. Combining that with some magic of having a film production company, we’ve come out with our first multi-cast last month. That’s what took me so long to get anything out content wise, and I’m still developing my visual skills in post production.

As far as the podcast goes, I’ve been connecting and networking with so many people that we’re looking to bring on several guests with in this year. It’s going to be an adventure as we’ll be having people from across the states join us. People that I’ve known for years, people that it seems like I’ve just really gotten to know through the whole weight loss journey. The CK Project  is going to another level as we are looking to make it a non-profit business, to help raise awareness and funds for mental health. The niche that the podcast is finding is weight loss and the affects on mental health. While we talk about a number of things, mental health seems to be the subject that keeps popping up, and it’s seemingly getting people interested in our message.

Yet to finish off where things are going, I do have a third brand, which is gaining the momentum that we wanted. The Geekultural Experience is a passion project of mine and Sarah’s. As we are geeks, and it’s one of the many things that I’ve had that has gotten me connected with people. We’ve got a podcast, which we’re still finding our niche, but it’s also helped Sarah start a few things on her own. She’s started up a local Steampunk group called the Coggle Society, and I think this is something that she’s going to shine in. I totally support that she’s doing this, however I’m not into the steampunk scene like she is. Though watching her work on this and watching her grow as a person because of this has been a wonderful thing to see.

We’ve got a busy year a head of us, as we’ll be doing charities as well as working in the community on a couple of other projects that are in the early stages of development. More details will be coming out as we get further into it.

With that, holy shit! I had more to say then I thought I would. I am the Director and that’s a wrap.

Something Big Is Brewing

I’ve gotten off from a great weekend. I got in an excellent workout on Saturday, published two blogs, broke down a script, and did a podcast. It was a great weekend, full of productivity, plus it was nice to give my three brands the love and attention they deserve.

As much as I’ve been struggling lately with the stars in life, it’s always good when I can get a weekend of positivity in. Mentally, being creative helps save me from myself. I can pour the energy and focus into it. It’s almost like an emotional rest for me. It gets complex, because of what emotions can develope from my writing.

I find that as a writer, I’m quite different than as person. In the real world, I’m generally positive, funny, and laid back. There isn’t much that upsets me, accept the enternal struggle with my mind.

As a writer, the subject tone is usually serious, and deep. I think that deep down, this is a way that I might be working through some of my emotional things. They say that a writer pours a bit of themselves into the characters. So, that either leads me to believe that the tragedy and traumas that I’ve suffered, might have helped lead me understanding a bit about other events that I might not have suffered myself.

At the same time, I know that anything I write, I would like guidance to give it authenticity. As I wrote the project Unexpected Side Trip, I wanted to represent the LGBTQA community as much as possible for the lead characters. As I work on the project I’ll be doing after, I want to do it justice as it deals with how people deal with grief from the loss of their child to juvenile leukemia. While I haven’t lost a child myself, I’ve had friends and family that have, and I want to represent it in the best possible light that I can. This is important to me, because this story has been in development for the last four years, and I’m just now able to get back to writing it.

We are working on some ideas to present with the Geekultural Experience, as right now the podcasting is some off the easier things to do. At the same time, it’s been a bit slow to gain momentum. https://anchor.fm/geekultural-exp/episodes/Cosplay-and-Halloween-e5d4v5 here’s the episode in case you’re interested in seeing what it’s all about. We’re thinking about hitting another convention for one day as we’re still really just trying to find our niche in this world.

Now, the big one that most people come to read about on these blogs, the CK Project. We’ve been working on merchandise, and I’ve had a few of the shirts made, and I think that they’re good quality. We just got some pull-over hoodies designed and in various colors. The response is great, and I’ve got a few people who’ve said that they were going to buy something. As this is going for motivation for weight loss and for mental health awareness, we’re looking to turn this into a non-profit organization. I think that I’m both excited and torn by this idea, but if it helps get the message out, then I’m all for the affect of progressing to something a bit different.

As for my progress, I’m currently at a stand still on my weight. I did however up the weight that I’m lifting. twenty-pounds added to my deadlift, and I felt like I was going to die. I’ve progressed on my kettle-bell, and the dumbbells that I’ve been using to do military presses.

I find that my circuit training had started getting to a point where I wasn’t getting the sweat like I had. I do also realize that going heavier comes with the complications of being able to injure myself easier, that’s why form is important. With that, I’m trying to take a bit more time with my reps so that I can be sure that I don’t hurt myself. Yet, I think this was also something I needed to help me get past this five-pound curse.

I will be checking-in with my doctor’s office tomorrow so that I could get back into my check-ins and to start the discussion of getting the skin-removal-surgery. I’ve been feeling uncomfortable in my skin lately. As I’ve been going along, I’ve started to feel that the surgery’s the answer that I need. Itchy, uncomfortable skin is a thing, so I’m going to deal with it until I don’t have to anymore.

I know that I put off my last appointment because of the fact that we had some earthquakes during that time. Now, I feel that I hadn’t because there’s something inside of me that’s afraid of getting the surgery. I’ve heard that it’s painful, and to be honest, I’m a bit anxious about having another surgery. That would include having to take off another six-weeks from work.

I guess that it’s the unknown that keeps me hesitant. I also know that I talk about self-improvement, so I should just take the plunge. This would be career wise as well. At least this is something that I’ve been actively taking into my hands over the last few years. It’s been slow, but with the weight loss, I’ve learned that I can and do deserve to be able to grow professionally.

I’m the director and that’s a wrap.

Lose And Gain

So, it’s been a while since I’ve done the official “weight-loss” update. Here goes; I gained four pounds. Yep, that’s the official update, I’m back up to 264 pounds. I’m not even mad, I knew the plateau’s and the weight gains would just all be apart of the process. So remember that!

You see the commercials on television and in print ads that someone can help you drop all the weight you want by a pill or a drink, with minimal work. It doesn’t work that way, ever. The truth is that while you will drop the weight, there will be times that you level out, and even gain some. Remember that it’s just part of the journey, and I know that’s the part that people hate.

It’s the plateau’s and the gains that cause most people to quit. I mean who wants to see the number stick or go up? We didn’t get into losing weight to see the momentum go anywhere but down? I gained five pounds, and I’ve worked so hard not to gain, what kind of bullshit is this?

I remember the first time I plateau’d after my surgery, God it was frustrating! Man it was the longest time before I dropped weight again(actually it was like three weeks). I don’t think I got mad at myself, but it was disappointing. Yet, I knew even then that it was part of the process, but after seeing my first hundred pounds just melt off, it sucked.

I think some habits have also snuck back into my life, especially since I’ve been in a bit of a stressful situation. I still have a win because one, I’m aware of it, and two, I’m still staying active. I’m going to overcome this situation. This is just another bump in the road that I have to overcome.

Mentally, I’ve been a bit down, but nothing too discouraging to know that I can’t overcome it. The mind is your most powerful weapon that you have. If you believe, then you can achieve. I know that my mind tells me that I can’t do things, like lunges. It doesn’t let me do lunges, and it makes me feel afraid that I’ll injure my knee. I don’t ever recall injuring my knee that way, but it makes it hard for me to go down without some sort of support. If I use a chair, then I know that I can do it.

On the positive side, I’ve been learning about various exercises from the Men’s Health Magazine, Twitter page. One of the exercises, that I’m excited about is the Mt. Climber, I’ve seen it done, but I realized that when I’ve done it before, I didn’t have the proper form for doing it. Another exercise is called the Halo. It’s an exercise that can use either a dumbbell or a kettlebell and it works the shoulders. This one excites me because it hits the shoulders from several angles. A third exercise that I’ve seen on video from Twitter is called a pike press. Modified, I think it would be a good exercise for me to do a shoulder press.

Another thing that I can say that is on the positive side, is that I’ve been looking into what kind of mindset an entrepreneur should have. I know that it’s going to take time, and a massive amount of hard work, but I will get there. I also know that I’m pushing for “maximum effort” because while one brand, or business is a full-time job, I have three that I’m working on.

With that, this is where things get a bit more convoluted, the CK Project is my oldest and most popular of my brands.  It’s great because I find that it’s the easiest to give most of my attention too. I support the fact that I get to help others with mental and physical guidance. This is what helped me become a happier person, and the privilege to help others has been fulfilling.

The birth of The Geekultural Experience actually spun-off of a group that I helped create called The Geeks of the IWV.  The group was formed as a way to help my friend cope with the death of her son, and it’s done fairly well. While The Geekultural Experience started on Facebook, it seems to have a better following on Twitter. I find that I get the news on Twitter so much easier more readily than Facebook.

While I enjoy my these brands and they fill a very different aspect of my life, the one I’m most looking forward to picking up is my film company, Luckey Bom Films. It’s more because I would love to have them all to be more equal then they are, but I’m sure this will get there at some point. It’s hard trying to keep things sorted out, and each get more attention, at different times when the focus can shift to what’s taking the more precedence at the time.

What would you like to see me talk about? Is there anything you think could help take my brands to another level? Leave a comment, and let’s start a dialogue, I’d love to interact and get feed back on the things I’m doing. After all, criticism is just a tool for improvement. This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Just Keep Going

I’m looking at bettering myself professionally. I’ve been trying to put in a few applications in to a few paces and see where it takes me. After all, I didn’t get that promotion at work, and it might just have been a way of saying that I should put in and see where life wants to take me. This is something that takes precedence with my motivation as of late.

It’s not that I dislike my job, it’s just I need to make some moves that can get me more money than I’m getting right now. Yes, there are things that I don’t agree with, but there are more pluses about this job than not. It’s been something that I had to figure out, but I do enjoy the interaction at work. There’s just things that make it all frustrating, and I’m trying to address those things.

I have a hurdle to overcome and I feel that it’s something that’s been holding me back in many aspects of my life. Wanna know what it is? I think that it’s marketing; plain and simple. I know that resume’s are supposed to be a way to market yourself unto employers. Let’s face facts, I think I could learn a thing of two about marketing my brands.

I think that with confidence, I’m better at talking doubt my brands because I can sell the passion that I have. Being told that I’m “an inspiration” by people might be the way I have to market myself. My charisma has always been something that I knew I would have to have, because my looks were always considered “undesirable” by the one’s I was attracted too.

Maybe my own condense and low-self-esteem is what has prevented me from being better at marketing myself? I think that I need to take the time to contemplate it, because I’m not the same person that I was. I feel better, and I’m more motivated to do things, even when things seem to be piling on. That’s life, and it doesn’t bother me as much as would be thought. At the same time, I’ve gotten better at reacting to the circumstances surrounding the various situations.

So, I want to ask the reader a few questions: let’s start with this, what would you like to see from me? I’ve gotten into designing shirts, and stickers, plus a few other items, but I’m sure there is something people would like to see, what is it that you would like to see the CK Project, offer?

Even better, for those who do read on Facebook, Tumblr, what is it that you think I should offer? What do you see are my strengths? Part of the reason I ask, is because I want to get more interaction from my readers. I want to start a conversation, and not just have people lurking. I want this to feel like something that starts a conversation and keeps going. I believe in you.

That goes for being humbled by the people I see in my life. I get many people saying that they keep up with my stuff, even if they don’t comment, and they are inspired and excited to see the progress, but I want this to be a discussion. How do we better ourselves? What kinds of things would be of great benefit for me to talk about?  How can I get you to join in the conversation?

I think this would help me better market myself, and improve the things that I’m already doing.  Here is my new merchandise store: https://teespring.com/stores/the-ck-project

This is the latest podcast on Bullying: https://anchor.fm/CkProject/episodes/Bullying-Ep–1-e4tkig/a-abgq9b.

I think that’s about it for this blog. This is the director and that’s a wrap.

 

Fix That Motivation With Time

I have been off of the nightshift for two weeks now, and I can’t say how much happier I am. It felt like the last six-months has been nothing but a dream. I am aware that I did some things, but I felt like I was in a fog for most of the time. My days were filled with zombified waling around.

I think part of the problem was that the night shift made me feel a bit lonely. I was reduced to being in bed with my wife for only two nights a week. There wasn’t many people coming through where I was stationed at night, and the night’s that I got the easiest post, I would begin to feel even more secluded. At least I could generally get in my steps with no problems.

Now that I have hours that the normal, sane, living person has, I am getting more of my creative flow back. I’ve been writing more than I had been in the last six months, and my mind is on fire with creativity and ideas to get things back on track. So, I’m back to providing content, and life is feeling good again.

There were things that I was thankful for about night shift though. The weather was over all cooler, and being back in one-hundred-degrees-plus during the day time reminded me of that. Oh and the fact that the earthquakes happened at that time. I don’t think I would have wanted to deal with the amount of people trying to get access to places they couldn’t because of the damage.

Getting back on track of things though, I’m thankful that there are people who do like the night shift. They are a special breed of people that thrive there, and I’m just not one of them. I mean I did well enough, but I just found that it wasn’t my cup of tea.

I’m finding that getting into the full swing of being on a normal shift seems to be taking me a bit longer than I expected to adjust, however I do know how resilient I can be. The 10,000 steps I take, seem to be a bit of a struggle to get too in the heat, but I know that it will be worth it in the end.

The shift in my mindset has been noticeable, as I’m working almost constantly to get more content out. If I’m not actually doing it, I seem to be thinking about it. My sleep patterns have gotten so much better. There really is something to be next to the person that I’ve spent almost half of my life with. I sleep better, and she sleeps better. Even my dog sleeps better.

With that being said, while I’ve had some set backs on getting the big content I wanted out. I have made the steps necessary to get that moving. We did some test shots last night as a part of getting ready to film our short. Re-writes are underway as I continue to work on getting the script ready to shoot. I’m just glad that I’m getting that motivation back to get things done.

I’m not sure if the night shift was conducive with my mental health, but I did learn so much about myself while being on there, and my appreciation for the people I deal with has grown. I’ve gotten so many reactions about not being seen for six months or more, and it makes me feel good to know that I was missed.

Sometimes I feel like I don’t make much of a difference in people’s lives, but then the reactions tell me otherwise. It reminds me of when I was in a darker mindset that if I wasn’t around, then nobody would miss me. I don’t actually think that way anymore because of all the praises and comments I get on a daily basis. Getting called an inspiration does feel good, and being able to reach out a helping hand has built in a new confidence in me.

The biggest thing that I can say about walking away from night shift is that I realized that I learned a part of my job that wasn’t likely to get too during the day shift and if that skill even needed to be applied during the busy hours, I could accomplish that aspect of the job.

Things have been set in motion and I can only look forward from here on out, I don’t ever think I will volunteer to go back on night shift, however if something was to force me onto it, I think I would survive it just fine.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Goals

This week, turned into something quite amazing with the amount of progress that’s been made this week. The things I set out to do a few years ago are starting to pay off.

Just like anything else in life, you should strive to achieve your goals. As my readers know, I have a film production company, and with that I’m excited to announce that we have moved onto pre-production for our next feature. Unexpected Side Trip has been something we’ve been working towards getting out of development since last year. It’s going to be the first time we work on a thriller. To be honest, this wasn’t really somewhere I ever thought I was going to go as a storyteller.

I had the realization yesterday that every project I’ve done has taught me a valuable lesson. When we started out doing brief thirty-second clips it was more of getting familiar with the operations, but when we finally progressed to do Appreciate What You’ve Got(2017) we learned what it was like to actually do a production. It was a huge learning experience since we’d never casted actors, and I never actually ran a crew before. It was the first time getting our feet wet in doing films.

Nash Gray(2017) was the first time I creatively collaborated with someone on a story. I did and will always appreciate my friend Ed Smith for giving me some wonderful characters to work with, and I thank him for taking up the mantel of Nash Gray. The biggest lesson I took way from this was learning what an actual production felt like. We worked on filming for a month, and far less of the duties actually fell on me as I had Celeste come in and be the cinematographer. The fact that she had experience in that department, allowed me to be a director, and that was my sole role. It was refreshing, and it reassured me that being a director was what I was meant to do. Dealing with a bigger crew, more locations, and a bigger cast presented its own sets of challenges, and it was fun to have had sets built to help complete the movie at hand.

The Reunion(2019) was by far the easiest of all the shoots. For one thing, I was blessed to have casted two actors who were very professional, and in an environment that favored the most laid back experience ever. It ended up being a script that I based off of one one of my creative writing assignments, and was fun to play around with. The lesson that I had with this project was more about using post effects in Adobe After Effects. While learning a complex program, which I have still yet to even crack the surface, I was able to start a basic animated title sequence, and add effects to the footage itself.

Now we’re pushing through with Unexpected Side Trip and with everything I have planned, I foresee the lesson is going to come in the form of distribution. Getting this out to festivals has always been the main goal since I adapted this from one of Ed’s short stories. We had gotten our location scouting done over the weekend, and I was able to take my son out to meet our contacts and teach him a bit about how to be professional in meetings like this.

Besides doing the film thing, I’ve also been spending time working on the other brands that I’ve created. The Geekultural Experience is getting ready to go to Wonder Con at the end of this week, and we are getting business cards to take and present while we’re out there. It’s exciting because at it is the third and final brand that we started, we’ve got logos designed and being worked on, and looking at what kind of merchandise we’d like to put it on. Pod casting has become the latest part of this brand, and we’re still feeling our way around, and we hope that it will gain more listeners as we go.

Speaking of merchandise, the daddy of all the brands, The CK Project is looking at getting some t-shirts and leggings to be released soon, plus we’re also looking at getting coffee mugs produced as well. I’m so excited as this has brought another level of creativity to my life, and I’ve already had people speak to me of their level of interest in such things. We also started a pod cast, which seems to have been received very well so far, and I’ve got people whom are wanting to get more involved with some of the subject matter that gets presented.

In the end this is all still a very new work in progress, and I can’t wait to see where it all takes me, and my family with the growth that’s been going on. Between all that, and my workouts, I achieved something that I never was sure I would be able too: Not have to deal with depression. I know that’s kind of weird to say, but keeping myself so busy has been the best way to stay away from the negative thoughts. I’ve been focusing more on the weight loss aspect because I don’t feel insecure about things like I used too. I know that it’s still there, just not popping up like it used too.

If you read this, and decide you’d like to know more about what we do, or have something you’d like to hear or see discussed, please feel free to drop a line.

This is the director and that’s a wrap.

The One-Sixty Point

So, I stepped on the scale the other day to do my weigh-in update, and I was fully clothed and I couldn’t process the number of 271.2 pounds. For a minute I couldn’t think about if I had lost or gained weight. I replaced the batteries because they were low, and took off my shoes to check in again and saw 269.9. I even checked it three more times. Yep, I lost more weight, six pounds as a matter of fact. It was strange that I couldn’t fathom the thought that I had lost that much in such a short amount of time.

Even more craziness is the fact that I haven’t been this weight since we first moved to California in 1997. It’s like I finally shedded off all the stress weight that had haunted me from the last nineteen years. Could this be part of the next part of a new phase for my life? My depression has been under better control than ever before, and life is taking off in unexpected directions.

I’m in a pants size that I hadn’t been in since high school, and that’s even more incredible. I find that funny that as I’ve lost weight, the places that I’ve lost inches and changed shape in areas that I wasn’t quite expecting. I guess that’s why twenty-two years ago, things hung on me different than they do now. Different movements, exercises, it’s crazy. Though I think it’s far different now, because experience has given me a different look at being disciplined  in life, and how my values have changed.

Today things are different because I’ve found the path in life that I wanted to take. I mean I knew at a young age that I wanted to eventually be a father. Yes, it’s not been easy, especially since my eldest child is way too much like me, and we’ve often times butted heads because of it. I never regretted having children, and they are everything to me. I love them, even the one who isn’t my blood, she’s a great kid, even if we struggle with some of her experiences in her early childhood. I’m not sure the want of kids because I was raised an only child, I do wonder if that could be why?

I think the decisions to becoming a filmmaker, and in turn a blogger, and then a podcaster was the focus I needed in order to embrace that which made me, who I was, both good and bad. I’ve added the layers to help become the person I am.

Becoming a director and to tell stories was given because it was a skill that I ended up developing when I was younger and telling stories. It’s the outlet I always needed, as I’ve been involved in various forms of entertainment since I was in grade school. Writing was something that I discovered that I enjoy as well.

Dealing with depression and viewing others experiences, and losses had lead me to blog about my struggles, as a means to help express myself, and always had the hope that others would find some sort of enlightenment from it. I’ll admit that wasn’t the only motivation to blog. The other reason was that I wanted to become a better writer, and apply that to my scripts. So far, I think that it’s come along quite aways. Again, I have no regrets in that decision.

I had the idea of becoming a podcaster for a while. It was always one of those ideas that I had in the back of my mind and we had toyed with it a couple of times before we found a solution that would work for us to present our material. As we go along, we’ll get better and develop better techniques. Again, hosting has been an idea that I wanted to do.

160 pounds down, and it feels that life is just really starting to take off. It motivates me to get more done. Life is getting better, and I’m always glad that people have taken to joining me on this journey. It really gives me a sense of validation, and I have a few who have been more than vocal about the changes they see. The praises are more than humbling, and it drives me to do even better.

I had no real direction, and I had to find a point to start to put my life back together. If you ever feel that way, the first thing I would suggest is take a long hard look at yourself, and ask the question, “why do I feel this way?” It’s not always an easy answer, and sometimes it ends up being a bitter pill to swallow when the answer smacks you in the face, but don’t deny it. It’s easy to be in denial about oneself, I’ve been there a few times, at least. If you can get over the ego, and the pride, you will grow. I think that self improvement is the only way to better themselves. The key to find myself was to invest in myself, and it’s gotten so much better.

With that, this is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Fifteen Month Check-Up

I had my check up on March second. I was greeted by Dr. Morgan, who has been the man that I’d been seeing mostly for the last year. I was glad to see that I had another loss and that I’m now currently sitting at 276 pounds on the dot. It’s amazing to see where I was last year compared to now, or even compared to where I was two years ago.

It feel good to go to work and someone that I hadn’t seen for a while comment that I looked malnourished, I found it to be funny that people think that I’ve lost so much weight that it was hard to recognize me.  Man, I really feel that I’ve come a long ways, and even better I’ve got to a twenty-two year low, with the fact that my pants are smaller than I was when I first moved to California.

I will admit that I think that I started to fall into a bad habit again with sneaking a few snacks here and there, but I’m going to correct that. I think that the fact that I can admit that and am aware is a step farther than I was before this whole thing started.

Before I continue on with the story, The CK Project has started a podcast: https://anchor.fm/CkProject/episodes/Introduction-to-the-weight-loss-process-e2qsnt/a-abgq9b 

https://anchor.fm/CkProject/episodes/Depression-1-e2qso8/a-abgq9b

These are our first two episodes, we’d really like to get them out to everyone, and get an opinion on what we’re doing.

As I look back, it’s been almost a year since I started to train with Sam over at Flawless Victory MMA, and I’ve enjoyed it. It’s not easy, but anything worth doing is never easy, but there have been so many benefits that have come from this whole process, and I’m getting that much closer to my goals. I remember when I had over 100 pounds to go, and being stuck in the sizes that I had been wearing since I was the biggest size I was.

On top of all that, I’ve decided that it was time to purge my closet of those things that are too big for me. I think this is a big step because it’s another step away from the past self that I’ve held on to for so long. I know that mentally I still have a ways to go, but I’m getting there, and I’m mentally more sound than I have been for some time.

I finally got past my creative funk, and all it took was for me to finally release The Reunion(2019), and I’ve gotten so much positive responses for it. If you want to see it, just hit me up and I’ll send you a link. I don’t try to cross the brands too much, but it’s always good when they come together for something that each can benefit from.

The crazy thing is, with working on three brands, I find that each one takes the main focus at different times. The CK Project is where most of the every day focus goes, and I’m making amazing connections through those who would be on the weight loss journey as well. I find that Luckey Bom Films is where most of my true passion is, because it’s the part that really saved my life when I was lost. With the Geekultural Experience,  it showed me something else I had a passion for, all things related to pop culture, and this last one is dedicated to my friends, and the son they lost because of the connections that has been brought into my life.

They come together and add to the layers in my life as it is. I’m happy that I can use my experiences in life to help others, there’s a joy there. I like that I can tell a story and have people connect somewhere emotionally to it. I also love the fellowship that comes out of celebrating what people are passionate about.

What is it that you’re passionate about? What makes your day get going? How do you feel when others tell you that it’s okay to follow your dreams? Sure people might think that it’s bullshit, and that they should play it safe, but like I said before, anything worth doing is never easy. If you can find a way to make a life out of what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life. Not all of us are gifted with the silver spoon, but the journey to get there is fun, and I’m excited to see what it’ll be like to finally make it.

This is a much lighter director, and while doing what I love, this blog is another wrap.

 

 

 

Push Forth Good Sir

Sunday, the day of rest. Well that’s the way it’s supposed to go, but this weekend it was the day that I pushed myself harder. My trainer Sam asked me if I’ve ever thrown up from working out. The answer was no, however today I pushed myself into a nauseous state. After I was done working out, I had to take a few minutes to myself in the car to gain some type of composure.

So goes my Sunday, I call it the iron church. I find myself going to the gym on Sunday’s more than any other day of the weekend. Our bodies are our temple. I feel that building a better me, means that I have to build a better temple, and what better way to sacrifice by blood, sweat, and hard work. I’ve been working out for almost a year. I’ve been doing the 10,000 steps for over a year now. I’ve gotten better about getting those in. I do have a days that I don’t feel like getting them in, and some days life gets in the way, however most days are filled with 10k plus. My current record stands at twelve days straight of getting in my steps. Since my fortieth birthday, I’ve been attempting to get in forty-days straight for my steps. This is a challenge I know I’ll eventually accomplish.

So I go to the gym today and do some treadmill. It wasn’t really about speed or distance, but I found out that I can do a seven-point-one, and I can keep it up for an amount of time. The biggest problem that I’ve been finding doing treadmill work is that I move, and no matter how tight I’ve tied my sweat pants, they seem to start to fall down.  After that I worked on arms, shoulders, and back a bit. I used heavier weight then I’m used to, and I push through the pain a bit. So, I’ll say that it was for the win today.

I was also rewarded with a non-scale victory today. After I came home and took a shower, I noticed the pants I was wearing were a bit big on me. The size of my pants were a 42×30, and that was the size I was in in 1997. So, without me checking my weight, it’s nice to feel that inches are still coming off. I’ll have to get that weight check in next weekend.

Besides pushing myself harder in my workouts. My circuit workouts, do also push me, by the way. I think people should do that in other parts of their lives. Wither it’s work, or  new experiences, it’s the perfect way to grow as a person. The sad part is that there are  too many people comfortable in what they are already doing.  I feel that people should strive to better themselves. You can always improve on something in your life. Health, wealth, learning. There’s always room for improvement. I’ve had many friends confess that they were scared of change. I’ll admit, that there’s a bit of hypocrisy as I write this. I want to change my station in life, but I haven’t just thrown “caution to the wind”. Though I am trying to get to the point were I will be doing what I want to do, instead of keeping it as a side thing at the moment.

If you’re feeling stuck in life, or bored of the way things seem to be going. I suggest pushing yourself into doing something new. Get out of the comfort zone. You’ll never know what you’re capable of until you do it. Sure, not all of it will be enjoyable, but there are going to be some amazing things that you’ll discover.  I feel that everything in life is about self discovery. That’s how I’m living my life these days. Every day brings something new for me to try.

I hope that you continue to follow my journey in life, as one of those things I’m planning on trying next is writing a motivational speech and see if I can get people to actually come and listen to what I have to say. I think blogging has been a great avenue that’s helped me become a better writer, and helped me sort of some of the issues that I deal with. Remember to catch me on my various other social medias as well. If you want to know, just send me a message and I’ll get back to you on it.  As always, this is the Director, and that’s a wrap.

 

Living With A Higher Code

There are times when a celebrity makes an impact on thousands, even millions of people world wide. Elvis, Lennon, Cobain; these are some of the artists who contributed to the meaning to so many lives in this world. With out these artists, the world seemed to grow a bit darker.

This week my childhood died. Rest in peace to the man who had the most impact on my life, Stan Lee. I can’t remember a time that his creations weren’t apart of my life.

When I was small, I would watch Spider-man and His Amazing Friends, or one of the other cartoons based off of his co-creations. I remember reading an article about how today’s super heroes are our modern day mythology, I wish I remember where I read it. It was good. It compared our heroes to the God’s of old, and the entertainment of their stories.

As the father and co-creator of so much that is popular in today’s society, Stan’s stories leave a legacy that defines a generation. For me it starts with what some would call his greatest creation: Spider-man. This character reached so many people because he was the different hero. The alias of Spider-man, Peter Parker was an average kid with everyday problems. He wasn’t considered the good looking, popular person that was the arch-type celebrated at the time. He wasn’t a jock and was considered a geek, when geek wasn’t a celebrated choice. He was described in Amazing Fantasy number fifteen, as a “wall flower”. He was bullied, and didn’t get the girl of his dreams.

That’s probably why he ended up being so popular because he spoke to the realities of most people. When his Uncle Ben was murdered, the quote, “With great power comes great responsibility,” has been something that has spoken to my heart and has stayed with me. Spider-man was who I could relate too, much like Black Panther was a character that the African-American community could relate too. Stan’s stories were made for us.

Note that I did start this blog on Monday as I read of Stan Lee’s death.

I felt a loss that was like I lost a grand parent, I lost a teacher. This was like I lost a mentor, who taught me everything I ever needed to know in life. Grandpa Stan, telling me the stories to entertain and educate. I was fortunate to meet him in 2011 at the San Diego Comic Con, it was a moment that meant so much, because I looked up to his works my whole life. I thanked him for doing the work that impacted my life. I doubt that my personal story with his work, is unique. I mean he had a huge stage, and millions of fans. Some famous people are among the fandom, and I’m glad that I get to see people share the stories of how Stan impacted their lives.

I should say that my love of comic books helped me get into the highest reading level classes in school. My imagination is very open to the strange possibilities of what the impossible can do, and I don’t think many things would surprise me if that happened. (Alien invasion, anyone?) This is what carried on with my high work ethic, and part of the reason I like to help people.

My helping and motivating comes from the lessons learned in the stories that I would read, and I still continue to read to this day. Selfishly, that’s the way I feel when I help someone. It gives me a real glimmer into that world that I so love. I was able to save a friend from taking their life, and it was the greatest feeling, I had that impact, much like the hero’s on the page.

Stan got me to actually like reading and being a fan of comics got me into seeing all the comic movies that would come out. That in turn lead me to seeing the movie that would change the direction of my future. Sin City(2005) was that movie that changed my life. Watching how that movie looked just like a comic, caused me to want to become a director, and that’s one of the great things I get to do these days.

Stan has had an impact on my family as we bound over the love of comics and superheroes. I see that my son loves the Hulk,  and I’ve been able to sit down and read the comics to him. My oldest loves Spider-man, which I was surprised about, but I’m glad that our love for Spidey is something we’ll share over the rest of our lives.

If there could be something I would say to Stan Lee, I would say this: Thank you. Thank you for being the voice of reason, the voice of inspiration, and imagination. Thank you for giving people who felt like losers a safe place to escape too. This world is a harsh place, and your legacy will continue to inspire generations. As a fan of mythology, thank you for giving us a newer, updated mythology to follow. I hope one day to be as inspirational as you, and I thank you for making my life just a bit more enjoyable.