Therapy is on the menu for this year, it’s okay when you’re not okay, but how do you get okay? Seek help from someone who understands. It’s not always easy looking for help, asking is even harder, and let’s face it, insurance isn’t always on your side when it comes to mental health. Why? Maybe it’s viewed as some sort of liability. It remains that seeking help from a professional is a great way to help deal with the difficulties in life. Especially when they sneak up and become overwhelming.
I know that being more active in blogging will also be something that will make this year just a tad bit easier for me. This is because typing out what’s going on is very theraputic in its own right, and I know that these written words have touched others in some fashion. Plus, I miss writing and this is practice for that other thing I like to do. However, I find that my writer’s block isn’t an issue so far this year.
There was a point where I had troubles coming up with things to discuss, because I felt like I had dealt with all that I needed to conquer. I had slayed the beast of my mental health problems, and became the champion, in my own mind. Kidding! I’m just kidding. I just didn’t have anything that I seemed to struggle with during that time.
The pandemic had hindered some of the goals I had set forth several years ago. I had caused me to become less motivated in exercise, since we were all in lock down at the time. Now it’s time to find that motivation and become an ass kicker once again. I did use some of that time to study and I had become a personal trainer, which I still do, and plan on diversifying even more as I continue, but I’ve ran into some issues that are slowly being resolved.
The biggest hindrance has been trying to film. We wanted to get started on filming our thriller Unexpected Side Trip, but that kind of got pushed aside. I’ve polished the script and think it’s a goal to get going in the near future. We ended up doing The Driver(2020) as a project to do over summer. I wanted to continue that story and had one treatment for it. I passed it around, and then decided to simplify it and made it longer. Do to situations beyond our control, we only got to film part of it, and then I decided that I wanted to go in a different direction with it. So, we’re taking the concept of what we filmed and use that as an ending to our first season, and I’m currently working on the story to feel out the events that lead up to it.
I’m glad that the writers block as finally passed. I’m glad that I’m being motivated to get things done again. After recovering from Covid, I finally was able to get the strength up to actually start doing yoga again. I was doing it for two-days-a-week in the beginning, and now I’m up to three. I plan on keeping it going and doing more days during the week. I’ve also gotten back to getting 12,000 plus steps in on most days and that’s something that’s been helping with my mental state as we..
Another thing that has put this year in a good direction is that issues that came up towards the end of last year are finally starting to resolve themselves, and I hope that this trend continues to go in a positive direction. We need this win.
Therapy is going to be key this year. I need to find that help since most aspects of my life seem to be “throwing curve balls in my direction”. Sad that being overwhelmed and losing control is what it took to realize that I couldn’t just handle everything, like I had been trying. Being everything to everyone was starting to become too much and it exhausted me. Helping my parents, has exhausted me. I’ll gladly do it, but it takes a tool. There’s a vibe that I can never seem to shake after I’ve been there.
I also hope that Sarah gets to a place that her physical pain isn’t as bad as it has been for the past several months. Her arm causes so many issues when she moves it. She said that the pain will cause her to pass out at times, and I honestly thought that she was exaggerating, until I witnessed it myself. It was a scary experience to say the least.
I think one of the best things to come out of last year was getting Duce, my son, into a school for kids with special needs. I’ll admit that I’m not impressed with the way the educational system seems to mishandle kids with special needs. They seem to get left behind. As a parent, I’ve been frustrated at seeing him struggle, and want to give up. This new school has him motivated and he’s finding that he has a chance to excel, and prove that he’s smarter than “the system” has given him credit for.
Towards the end of December, we were involved in a car accident on our way home from shopping and that’s left us without a vehicle. I appreciate those who’ve helped give us rides in our time of need. It’s made me realize that being able to take myself to work is a freedom that I’ve taken too much advantage of, and it’s been missed. However, that’s an issue that is currently being resolved. At least no-one was severely hurt during the collision.
I think the thing to take away from this blog, is that it’s a time to take a risk and move things forward. I’m planning on taking a positive mindset into this new year, because it’s worked for me in the past. My friend told me that I needed to take life, one-day-at-a-time. I’ve had so much anxiety and worry do to all the things that life is throwing at me, I tend to forget that all I can do is handle things in that way.
With that, I often feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders, and it really does overwhelm me. That’s why I’ve had depression and the mental block that’s kept me from feeding my soul.
Well, that’s a wrap on another blog. Thanks for sticking with me through everything. This is the director and that’s a wrap