Rollercoaster Of Weight

I’ve been struggling with a few pounds here or there. I think it’s probably because I’ve gotten into a few bad habits, and the fact that it seems like it’s been a bit of a struggle to keep my momentum up with my activity, especially since it’s stupid hot outside, and it’s not very motivating going out in one-hundred-degree-plus weather. I know that I’ve got this; it’s just taking a bit more time to get back to that spot of motivation.

I know that I’ve come a long ways, and I still have a long ways to go, so I’m not discouraged about this. I will continue to make progress on my journey, and this is just a slight hiccup. The fluctuation in weight is always a small part of the journey to losing weight.

I know most people think that it’s just a drop and that’s the measure for success. Hell, there are even infomercials on television that try and sale that dream as well. Yet, the truth is, it doesn’t work that way. No muscle doesn’t weigh more than fat, it’s just more compacted. One pound of fat is equal to one pound of muscle, the only difference is in the amount of space each takes. A fat two-hundred-sixty-pound man takes up more space than a lean muscled two-hundred-sixty-pound man. The shape is very different as well.

I can attribute my current struggle with a couple of things. The first factor being the heat. Second factor is that I did change my work schedule, and everything that’s involved with that tends to be a bit of a distraction, however, I’m now working that out to maximize my walking. I’ve been able to get my ten-thousand steps in, even just barely at work.

Another factor that I have only let on in a few blogs is that I have life stressors that have been getting to me a little. With Sarah’s Crohn’s Disease being something that we’ve been trying to deal with for about a year, I find that the change in our life flow has disrupted a few things with me emotionally. Another being that we are now really seeing the after effect damage that the earthquake did to our house. It’s one of those things that I realize is going to take some extra money, that we don’t necessarily have access to handle it effectively.

This all goes along with the fact that I didn’t get that promotion at work. I’ve been trying to play it “cool” and act like it doesn’t bother me, but it does. To know that I’ve come a long way, and have grown so much, just to know that it wasn’t good enough, is very disheartening. I think it’s made worse by the fact that over all, I thought I had it in the bag. I was making plans for something that I thought was going to be guaranteed.

On the plus side, it has motivated me to seek other paths to take, and I’m going to put forth my best effort. I think the hardest part is selling myself. I have to find those tricks that would help show the better side that people want to see when looking for new employees. I’ve been settled in the same position forever, and the fact that it has taken me the last few years to finally find some amount of self-worth is really just the beginning.

I think that’s the valuable lesson here, is that improvement never stops. We continue to learn, we continue to grow. That’s part of the defining factors for self-improvement. I do know that I have value, I get that feeling all the time from the people I interact with. I do know that I’m an inspiration, because I get told that all the time too. I think I just need to find a better way to represent myself on paper.

Something I think is great, is the fact that I’ve gained so many skills since I’ve been doing this whole life change. I’ve become a filmmaker, a blogger, a podcaster, an apparel designer, writer, editor, motivational speaker, pop-culture reporter. That’s quite a list of skills, and I know that some people are thinking, how does that apply to the “real world” with “real jobs”.

I can’t completely answer that yet, but I do know that I’m making an impact and I plan on continuing on doing that. It fulfills a requirement inside of my soul. This helps my balance in life, and it keeps me striving to be better at being who I am.

I’m going to focus and get back on track. The creative part is more alive in me now than it has been in quite some time, and I’m feeling better about it. Now I do have a feeling I know where life plans on taking me, but I also know that I’m in for a bit of work to get to the success that I need to have. I know most people only see the success for people, but never really witness the work that gets put in to get there. This is it people, this is the tie for me to really push to get where I need to go, and not let myself get distracted like I have in the past.

This is the director, and that’s a wrap.

Categories: Life, Weight Loss JourneyTags: , , , ,

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